The Impact Short Form, 11.09.06

In Memoriam: Ed Bradley, a guy who taught us all what a real journalist was like.

In Memoriam II: Markus Wolf, a true role model for spooks of all political persuasions, and a personal hero of mine.

It’s actually been a while since I’ve watched any TNA. Lack of time, lack of sleep, and lack of desire after that abominable Sting title win (yes, JJ, you can justify it, but you can’t excuse it) combined for the perfect storm to create a slight void in what TNA is actually doing. There’s also the fact that I cover the tapings in my Tuesday column, and I get slightly confused as to when things are being played out.

Coherence is a problem for me right now. I’m actually forcing myself to stay up in between bouts of work in order to get this one in the can. I’d like to take a nap while Impact’s downloading, but it’s a pretty quick download and I know that if I fall asleep, I am not going to get up in time to get back to work. So, therefore, I’ll crank out this intro, start in on Impact, and finish it off. It also removes the burden of getting this done from me, thus enabling me to fall asleep when I get back home with a clear conscience. Maybe I can get a jump on next week’s 50 Club while waiting for Smackdown to be uploaded.

(Of course, having written this, I proceeded to crash and burn. That being said, it’s the first reasonably full night of sleep I’ve had this week, so I’m not complaining.)

Hey, it’s a plan. Either that or I’ll finally read Ralph Steadman’s memoirs about working with HST. Who knows? All I can figure is that I have to do Impact, I have to do it now, so I might as well make you suffer…

Match Results:

A. J. Fuckin’ Styles over Ron Killings and Bobby Roode, Silly Tournament Semi-Finals (Pinfall, Styles pins Killings, rollup): Nice pace to the match, but they tried to cram just a little too much into it. However, Roode didn’t need to be carried as much as I thought he might, considering who he was in there with. A case can be made for an intriguing proposition here: Roode in an Ultimate X Match? Well, they pushed Joe into one, so why not? He’s just about ready.

Petey Williams over Austin Aries and Johnny Devine, X Division Triple Threat Match (Pinfall, Williams pins Devine, Canadian Destroyer): A surprising bit of booking there, giving Williams the win. However, it was necessary on a practical level. Ever since the Team Canada break-up, Williams has been floundering, especially compared to Young and Roode. Even Devine’s had his moments in the sun. If that means sacrificing Aries’ push for one night to give Williams some stabilization, so be it. So, no real complaints here about that. Add the fact that it was accomplished during a pretty decent match, and it’s a sign that TNA can actually do something with the X Division when they want. And you need to credit Russo for that. There’s no way around that one, folks.

Devine just buys a little time by breaking up a pinfall involving guys with a chance to win this match

Abyss over A. J. Fuckin’ Styles, Number One Contender’s Match (Pinfall, Black Hole Slam): Well, duh. The moment Styles was revealed as his opponent (earlier in the show), it was obvious that Abyss would get the title shot. The only thing that mattered was how they got there. And this trip was rush hour on a potholed street. The run-ins, the restart, A. J. taking the pinfall due to Chris Sabin, who at this point shouldn’t be placed into that position (Christian we’ll buy, but Sabin?)…yuck. Well, at least Another Phil Collins-Related PPV will have an intriguing main, and we’ll get the freak show of Angle/Abyss next week. In prime time, let’s not forget. TNA sure won’t let us.

If you ever wondered how they changed the lightbulbs at the Impact Zone, now you know

Angle Developments:

It’s not 1996. It’s not the Bingo Hall. It’s not the Triple Threat with Douglas. Therefore, it’s not anything to care about.

Honestly, nothing else. Lots of match pimping, especially for the prime-time debut next week, but nothing of any substance.

Smackdown’s downloaded already, so I’ll get into that. Join me in a few hours for another column.