Pulse Wrestling’s WWE Royal Rumble Report

MNM (w/ Melina) vs. The Hardy Boyz
Lots of back & forth action to start this match. MNM gets the advantage on Matt. Plenty of double teaming, and finally Jeff gets tagged in. Nitro is laid out and both Hardys go to the top, on opposite ends of the ring. Jeff goes off with a splash, and Matt goes off with a leg drop, but Nitro gets his knees up, as Matt connects, and Jeff gets the knees to the gut. MNM holds things down, and continues to double team on Jeff now. They get the hot tag to Matt finally, but the ref didn’t see it. Matt finally gets the tag, and does the bulldog/cutter thing. MNM gets Matt up for a Snapshot, but Jeff breaks it up. Hardys do a Poetry in Motion on Mercury, but then tries to do it to Nitro, only Nitro ducks, and rolls up Matt for 2. Matt hits the Twist of Fate on Nitro, and then he and Mercury fall to the ring, as Jeff tags in Matt, and hits the Swanton for the win.
Winners – Hardyz

Cool promo of this year’s WM theme…’All Grown Up’.

Edge and Orton go get their numbers. They bicker a bit. After they get the numbers, Edge says that he’ll show Orton his if, Orton shows him his. HAHAHA. King Booker comes in and says ‘tell me you didn’t say that’.

Recap of Lashley/Test.

Bobby Lashley (c) vs. Test – ECW Title – Extreme Rules
Very quick yawn fest. Lashley dominates, and tosses Test to the outside, and Test just walks away and gets counted out. Lashley tracks him down, and brings him back to the ring and hits a running powerslam.
Winner via Count Out – Lashley

The doc is checking up on Cena’s spleen. Cena doesn’t want to be checked up on. Vince comes in and doesn’t think Cena has a shot at winning.

Recap of Kennedy/Batista

Batista (c) vs. Mr. Kennedy – World Heavyweight Title
Batista dominates the beginning of the match. They fall to the outside, and Kennedy shoves Batista into the steps, and Batista seems to have hurt his knee. Kennedy continues to work on Batista’s injured knee. Batista starts to fire up and nails a spinebuster. The ref gets bumped when Kennedy fights out of the Demon Bomb, and Kennedy nails a kick to the crotch, then the Rude Awakening. The ref is still down, so Kennedy gets him back up and then DDT’s Batista, but for a 2 count. HUGE Kennedy chants, and Kennedy goes to the 2nd rope and dives toward Batista, but Batista levels him with a clothesline, and then hits the Demon Bomb for the pin.
Winner – Batista

Backstage, Little Bastard picks a number for Finlay, and Coach makes fun of him. LB attacks Coach…but Khali comes in, and LB runs away. Khali takes 3 numbers, and Coach tells him he can only have one. He drops two, and Kelly Kelly (who is rolling the cage this year) picks them up and says they are 2 of the biggest balls shes ever held….this gets a ‘DAMN’ from Simmons.

Recap of Umaga/Cena.

John Cena (c) vs. Umaga (w/ Armando) – WWE Championship – Last Man Standing
Umaga targets Cena’s midsection. They fall to the outside, and Umaga slams him into the wall. Umaga takes the top of the steps and tosses it into the ring. Cena picks them back up, and tosses it back into Umaga’s face! Umaga brings the bottom steps in the ring, but Cena nails the throwback, planting Umaga’s face on the steps, and follows it with the standing powerbomb on the steps. Umaga gets up from the 10 count. Umaga sets Cena up in the Tree of Woe, but Cena dodges the diving headbutt. Cena slams Umaga into the post, and then clocks a monitor across his head. Cena then tries a F-U, but he falls and Cena’s face bounces off the steps. Umaga lays out Cena on the far end announce table, and then runs across them and goes to splash Cena, but Cena moves. Armando loosens the ropes, and a turnbuckle falls. Umaga tries Samoan Spike Cena with the turnbuckle end, but Cena dodges it, drop toe holds, and wraps the loose rope around Umaga’s throat and locks on the STFU. Umaga passes out, and does not answer the 10 count.
Winner – Cena

Sandman pulls his number, and drinks. Flair is the last to pick, and Kelly, Leyla and Brooke dance for him.

Royal Rumble hype.

The Rumble itself will be tough to recap, so bare with me.

Royal Rumble
Ric Flair pulls #1 and Finlay pulls #2. Ties up and such, Kenny is #3. Kenny and Flair fight, and Matt Hardy comes out at #4. Nothing big happens, Edge pulls #5, and flies in spearing Flair and Kenny. Edge charges Matt, but Matt dodges it and Edge slams into the turnbuckle, then hits a Twist of Fate on Edge. Flair rolls out and puts some chairs in the ring to Conchairto Edge, but Kenny tosses him out of the ring. Edge then tosses Kenny. Dreamer pulls #6. Sabu pulls #7, and pulls out a table right away. Sabu & Dreamer square off. Gregory Helms is #8, and he tosses a shirt in Matt’s face and attacks him. Shelton is #10, and we still have nothing big, besides lots of teasing of sending someone over the top through the table. Kane pulls #10, and he comes in and cleans house. Dreamer is tossed out by Kane, and then he goes to toss Sabu on the table, but Sabu lands on the apron. Kane then choke slams Sabu off the apron and through the table!! Punk is #11 and he goes right after Edge. Booker comes out pulling #12, and eliminates Helms. Super Crazy is #13. Jeff Hardy pulls #14. Hardys do plenty of double teaming. Kane goes for a double choke slam, but they kick him in the crotch, and hit the Poetry in Motion. Sandman pulls #15. Sandman cracks Jeff, Crazy, and Matt all with his cane, but then Booker tosses him out. Randy Orton pulls #16, and Rated RKO tosses Crazy. Edge then tosses Jeff Hardy, and Orton tosses Matt Hardy. Benoit is #17. RVD pulls #18. He kicks Booker in the face, and Kane tosses Booker out. Booker comes back in, and beats down Kane, and tosses him out of the ring. Viscera is #19, and Nitro is #20. Thorn is #21. Hardcore Holly is #22. All the men work on getting Vis out, and HBK comes down as #23, tossing Finlay out right away. HBK then superkicks Viscera, and everyone else shoves him over the top. Masters pulls #24. Nitro goes to the top, and Benoit shoves him down to eliminate him. #25 is Chavo, and as he leaps in the ring, Benoit pulls Thorn out of the ring like he did Big Show 3 years ago when he won. MVP is #26, and RVD eliminates Masters dropkicking him over the top rope. Carlito is #27, and Khali is #28. Khali headbutts & chops all around. The Miz is #29, as Khali eliminates Holly, then Benoit, Miz, RVD, Punk, Carlito, & Chavo. Undertaker is #30, and he goes toe to toe with Khali, and UT tosses him! UT then tosses MVP. MVP gets back, and tosses a chair back into Orton, who clocks UT with the chair. Edge lines up for a spear, and it looks like he’s aiming for Orton, but Orton turns around with the chair, and they bicker. HBK comes over and Orton RKO’s him, and HBK falls to the outside, but under the ropes. UT lights up, snake eyes and big boot on Edge, and then he goes to choke slam Orton, but Edge comes over and spears him. Orton slaps UT with the chair again, and they are going to set up for a Conchairto. HBK makes his way back in the ring, and tosses both Edge and Orton. UT and HBK square off. Tons to teasing elimination, and HBK comes off the top turnbuckle with an elbow drop. HBK calls up the band, and goes for the superkick, but UT blocks it and nails a HUGE chokeslam. UT goes for the Tombstone, but HBK slides through and nails the superkick. UT is trying to keep his balance by holding the ropes, and HBK tries another superkick, but UT ducks it and tosses HBK over the top (in a blown spot, as it looked like UT was supposed to lift HBK from his crotch over, since it was exposed due to the superkick, however, UT grabbed both of HBK’s feet, and UT just picked him up and tossed him).
Winner – The Undertaker

Here is the full listings
Order of Entry:
1) Ric Flair
2) Finlay
3) Kenny Dykstra
4) Matt Hardy
5) Edge
6) Tommy Dreamer
7) Sabu
8) Gregory Helms
9) Shelton Benjamin
10) Kane
11) CM Punk
12) King Booker
13) Super Crazy
14) Jeff Hardy
15) The Sandman
16) Randy Orton
17) Chris Benoit
18) Rob Van Dam
19) Viscera
20) Johnny Nitro
21) Kevin Thorn
22) Hardcore Holly
23) Shawn Michaels
24) Chris Masters
25) Chavo Guerrero
26) Montel Vontavious Porter
27) Carlito
28) Great Khali
29) The Miz
30) The Undertaker

Order of Elimination:
1) Ric Flair (Edge)
2) Kenny Dykstra (Edge)
3) Tommy Dreamer (Kane)
4) Sabu (Kane)
5) Gregory Helms (Booker)
6) The Sandman (Booker)
7) Super Crazy (Edge & Orton)
8) Jeff Hardy (Edge)
9) Matt Hardy (Orton)
10) King Booker (Kane)
11) Kane (Booker who re-entered the ring after being eliminated)
12) Finlay (HBK)
13) Viscera (HBK, Thorn, Shelton, Nitro, Holly, Benoit, RVD, Edge, Punk)
14) Shelton Benjamin (HBK)
15) Johnny Nitro (Benoit)
16) Kevin Thorn (Benoit)
17) Chris Masters (RVD)
18) Hardcore Holly (Khali)
19) Chris Benoit (Khali)
20) The Miz (Khali)
21) RVD (Khali)
22) CM Punk (Khali)
23) Carlito (Khali)
24) Chavo Guerrero (Khali)
25) Great Khali (Undertaker)
26) Montel Vontavious Porter (Undertaker)
27) Randy Orton (HBK)
28) Edge (HBK)
29) Shawn Michaels (Undertaker)

Show Over.
~Pk