Counterfeit Pennies: Just Another Disappointing Catfight at WrestleMania

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With two of the best women’s wrestlers in WWE history – Trish Stratus and Lita – saying goodbye late last year, readers of this column may think that what I am about to say is a little harsh given the aforementioned circumstances. With that said, I will not feel one iota of remorse when I say that the WWE Women’s Championship is about to be even more desecrated at this year’s WrestleMania than when Stephanie McMahon held the title for five months back in the year 2000. (Credit: WWE’s History of the Women’s Championship)

At the very least, Stephanie’s title reign at the time added fuel to the fans’ fiery hatred of the McMahon-Helmsley regime. Also, Lita’s first Women’s Title victory came at the expense of Stephanie, so at the end of the day WWE used Stephanie’s status as the despised jezebel to help Lita’s ultimately successful push as a singles competitor.

My overall point is this: Flashing forward to this year’s WrestleMania, there is obviously no long-term plan in place for the Women’s division, and instead of focusing the WrestleMania spotlight on their most talented women’s wrestlers – namely Mickie James and Victoria – we are getting the tired, tedious, and probably trademarked Playboy Cover Girl Push as Ashley takes on current Champion Melina.

Aside from the frivolity of the whole thing, the saddest part about the Ashley-Melina match being on the biggest stage of them all is that in a matter of mere months, WWE has completely wasted all of the momentum that Mickie James was given when she beat Lita in Lita’s retirement match this past November. At that time, the proverbial torch was logically passed onto the most promising Women’s wrestler on the roster, for Mickie had shown her chops both in the ring and as the unstable character that obsessed over Trish Stratus.

And yet here we are with Melina as the Stephanie McMahon retread – say what you want about her politicking and lack of wrestling skills, at least Stephanie was a great heel character on camera, whereas Melina is more annoying than she is engaging – and Ashley as the Sable/Torrie/Christy Hemme wannabe who is more known for her physical assets than her in-ring abilities (and no, pulling masks off of Paul London and Brian Kendrick does not count as an ability).

Ultimately, I will venture to guess that the Women’s Championship will change hands from Melina to Ashley at WrestleMania. The match will assuredly be the quintessential Divas filler match that will be sandwiched between two of the main events that are on the card, and the crowd will be into it for all of the wrong reasons. In fact, newly minted WWE Hall of Famer Jerry “The King” Lawler will be there to call the action, and as such there will be plenty of sexual innuendo chock filled with references to puppies and catfights and Playboy covers.

Something tells me that Lawler didn’t make the Hall based on his color commentary for the plethora of Women’s matches he’s “called” over the years. That same something tells me that WWE – possibly at the insistence of Stephanie herself, who made for better television seven years ago as a cog on camera than she does today as a creative mind behind-the-scenes – is content to keep their Divas busy with photo shoots and gravy bowl matches while blatantly ignoring actual wrestling prowess.

Will we ever see Mickie James against Victoria in what could be a promising Ladder, Cage, or Hell in a Cell match?

How about a Women’s Money in the Bank or a Divas Elimination Chamber?

Unfortunately, I just don’t see these events in the cards – or on the WWE cards – anytime soon

CB is an Editor for Pulse Wrestling and an original member of the Inside Pulse writing team covering the spectrum of pop culture including pro wrestling, sports, movies, music, radio and television.