Pulse Wrestling’s Raw Report For 10/29/2007

Post Cyber Sunday Thoughts

To begin tonight’s live coverage of WWE RAW, I want to recollect on what some people are calling one of the better shows WWE has put on. The WWE took a Pay-Per-View that has always been a dismal show and by the power of you, the fans, the superstars and WWE creative have taken and gave us a show worth the $40. While I missed out, due to me being skeptical of the show, I have to say that I may order the replay. Pulse Wrestling had great coverage of Cyber Sunday by our own PK. I participated in the roundtable, and I did better than TNA’s Bound for Glory.

With that said, the fans had their say for one night. Now it is time for WWE to book things their way.

WWE RAW Preview

HHH v. Orton & Umaga – AGAIN! – Triple H had a glorious beating handed to him at No Mercy Cyber Sunday. For his reward, he gets to face the WWE Champion and Umaga in a handicap match. I smell shenanigans.

Coach v. Hornswoggle – I wonder what will they do next?

A new Diva is born – It’s down to Brooke and Eve. Who will become the newest WWE Diva?

Divas Battle Royal – Halloween Style – Which diva will be the last one standing in this ghastly battle royal?

Respect Earned? – Last week, Hardcore Holly came to Cody Rhode’s aid, saving him from a beatdown from the World’s Greatest Tag Team. What will occur between Rhodes and Holly tonight?

One Last Thing

Y2J – Chris Jericho has been talked about more than anyone else in the last month. Tonight, a lot of questions may be answered or more questions will be asked. Ironically, Jericho is in Philly tonight, but will he show up tonight on RAW? Stay tuned to Pulse Wrestling because all will be revealed.

Welcome to Pulse Wrestling’s Monday Night RAW Report! I’m Paul Marshall, the one who will be taking you down the red bricked road tonight. Are you ready?

I said ARE YOU READY? Then, for the thousands of readers…and the millions watching at home. It is time to get the show going!

Live from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Opening video, pyro, and we are LIVE on Monday Night RAW! Triple H has a handicap match tonight, but we are welcomed by Maria! The Halloween Costume Battle Royal will commence shortly.

Divas Battle Royal

This is open to all divas from all brands. I’ll only keep track of eliminations here, since battle royals are hard to keep track of.

Leyla is the first eliminated.
Brooke is eliminated.
Jillian is eliminated.
Maria is eliminated.
Michelle McCool is eliminated.
Melina & Mickie James are eliminated.
Victoria is eliminated.
Torrie is eliminated.

Winner: Kelly Kelly
Match Rating: NR

Post match, WWE Women’s Champion, Beth Phoenix enters the ring. Kelly tries to leave the ring, but she is thrown back in by Jillian Hall and Melina. Beth Phoenix lays waste to Kelly Kelly.

We segue into last night’s show. Shawn Michaels got 59% of the popular vote to face Randy Orton. HBK gave it his all, but came up short. Shawn is here tonight and he is coming out to the ring!


We are back. Coach takes on Hornswoggle tonight! But for now, you have to deal with the Sexy Boy, Shawn Michaels. He has a microphone and he is back into the saddle again. He thanks the fans that voted for him last night. The good news, he kicked Randy Orton into December once again. The bad news, it was all for naught. He goes H-B-Shizzle on us, saying that since he won the match last night he wants a rematch. He wants that match NOW!

This brings out Mr. McMahon. He asks the important question, to which he gets an astounding response. He asks Shawn what he is doing. Mr. McMahon says that Shawn Michaels wants to be the biggest WWE Champion of all time. Vince rambles about how there is a small part of HBK’s soul that is rotten. He goads Shawn Michaels into admitting it. He says that the next time he leaves the industry it will be on his terms. Shawn Michaels wants to hurt Randy Orton he wants to make him feel his pain.

This brings us to discussion on Survivor Series. The rematch is on for the Pay-Per-View. Shawn Michaels versus Randy Orton for the WWE Championship! What will Shawn do with it! SWEET CHIN MUS— Just kidding. He ghost kicks Mr. McMahon, sending him down on his ass.


We are back and Brooke & Eve are dancing for our votes. Time for a match, I say.

Hardcore Holly & Cody Rhodes v. The World’s Greatest Tag Team

Hardcore Holly and Shelton Benjamin begins things off. Benjamin uses the power game on Holly, which is surprising. Haas tags in and he beats on Holly. Holly unleashes the chops of doom on Haas, who turns and turns it into his favor. Benjamin tags in and beats on Holly for a second, until Haas gets tagged back. Both men connect with each other, allowing Rhodes to get tagged into the match. Nice dropkick by Rhodes gets one. Cody backs Haas into the corner. Haas whips Rhodes to the opposite corner and explodes with a powerslam. Holly and Benjamin fight on the outside. DDT connects on Haas and Rhodes picks up the win!

Winners: Cody Rhodes & Hardcore Holly
Match Rating: *

Holly gives Rhodes a dirty look before leaving the ring. Backstage, Randy Orton psyches up Umaga.


We are back and we are reminded about Candice Michelle’s injury. She broke her collar bone in two places. The WWE did wrong by allowing the match to continue.

Backstage, Todd Grisham asks Beth Phoenix if she has any regrets about taking Kelly Kelly and Candice Michelle out. Beth has no regrets. Beth says that Candice did all she could for nothing. Y2J chants can be heard in the shot.

Mickie James chats it up with Trevor Murdoch. She thanks him for saving her from nearly losing her head last week. Mickie James says that she isn’t all that innocent. Lance Cade enters into the shot and he blames Murdoch for the loss last week. They talk about keeping their focus.

William Regal complains to Vince McMahon about booking Triple H against Randy Orton & Umaga. Vince doesn’t want to see anyone injured, but with Triple H it is personal. He asks about Hornswoggle and he is brought inside the room. Vince asks Regal to leave. He shares a heart to heart with him and he has a confession with him. He wants Hornswoggle to stand on his own feet. He explains the reasoning for booking Hornswoggle against Coach. He wants Hornswoggle to learn that if he is knocked down, that he gets back up. He wants him to be successful. He wants Hornswoggle to learn to hate if he wants to be successful. Hornswoggle gets all psyched up like a dog with rabies. His match is up next!


A new SAVE_US video plays. I didn’t catch the specifics of that one yet. Coach comes out to the ring. He looks like he wants to hurt someone.

Jonathan Coachman v. Hornswoggle

I am watching this wondering if Y2J will save us from this abortion in the making. Sadly, he doesn’t as the match begins. There is no referee, oh yeah we have a special guest referee! It is Mick Foley! This will be very interesting. Foley checks Coach for weapons. The bell rings as the match starts. Coach backs Hornswoggle into the turnbuckle. Hornswoggle takes Coach off his feet with a dropkick. He rides Coach for a moment. Coach picks Horny up and he bites him for his trouble. Mick Foley throws Hornswoggle into Coach. Shining Wizard connects, but Horny misses the elbow. Coach tells Mick to get out of the way, but Horny accidentally hits Mick in the eyes. Coach takes Foley off his feet and he brings a chair into the ring. Foley is back up and he takes the chair away from Coach. He decks Coach and he pulls out Mr. Socko. He changes his mind and takes out Little Socko. MANDIBLE CLAW ON THE NUTS!!!! Tadpole Splash connects for the three!

Winner: Hornswoggle
Match Rating: ***** for comedic value. * for the wrestling.

Poor Coach. Backstage, Triple H is being interviewed by Todd Grisham. He notes that Triple H has taken a lot from Umaga. Triple H thanks Todd for the pep talk about the current tragedies going on in his life. Triple H is a gambling man and has an ace up his sleeve. He reminds everyone that he is the Game.

Wrestlemania 24 will come to the Citrus Bowl March 30th, 2008. Tickets will be on sale this Saturday!


Back to the action as Brian Kendrick & Paul London make their way to the ring. Paul London will be in action tonight. He will be facing Lance Cade, with Trevor Murdoch assisting him tonight..

Paul London v. Lance Cade

They lock up and they counter everything but the sink. London gets a cross body for a one count. J.R. references the tag title win by London & Kendrick while they were in South Africa. Back to the action as Cade takes it to London, nailing clubbing blows to the back. Cade misses a block and London gets a springboard for two. Standing hurrancurana was perfectly nailed, but Cade nails London outside. Murdoch lurks on the outside, but Kendrick sacrifices himself to save his partner. Dropkick by London, but he runs into a sit-out Uranage for the loss.

Winner: Lance Cade
Match Rating: *

The Highlanders come out to the ring, staring down Cade and Murdoch. They take out London and Kendrick with the springboard reverse suplex. They stand tall as the tag champs retreat to the back.


Tomorrow night on ECW, the ring better be reinforced. Nearly a ton of mass will collide in the ring at the same time, proving to be interesting.

RAW is back on the air as Jeff Hardy is out and in the ring. His tag partner D.H. Smith, being billed from Calgary, Alberta Canada, and having generic music.

Jeff Hardy & D.H. Smith v. Carlito & Kennedy

The bell rings as Hardy & Kennedy start things off. They circle the ring, jockeying for position. Greco Roman lock into the ring, as Kennedy gets the side headlock. Kennedy gets an arm drag attempt, but Hardy gets a short arm clothesline to take Kennedy down. Tag to Carlito, he rams his shoulder into Hardy’s sternum. Carlito blocks a kick, but Hardy counters to an enzugiri. Double leg drop gets two as Hardy tags Smith in the ring. He gets a standing wristlock as Carlito backs him to the corner. Carlito nails lefts as he kicks Smith in the face. Carlito gets dispatched as Kennedy runs in. Hardy takes and tosses Kennedy out as we go to commercial.


We are back to the action as Carlito is on the offensive. Kennedy nails a kick to the knee on D.H. Smith during the break. Carlito works on the leg and he tags in Kennedy. Kennedy works on the leg some more, getting a close two count. Kennedy slams the knee to the canvas, but Smith fights back. Kennedy nails Hardy. Hardy nails Kennedy as the referee is distracted. Carlito is in illegally, but the referee sends him away. Kennedy back inside for a second, but he tags back to Carlito. Smith’s leg is being tweaked as Kennedy is back in the match. Enzugiri connects as Hardy is in! Carlito is in as well! Wraparound clothesline connects as Carlito nails an elbow. WHISPER IN THE WIND gets TWO! Kennedy gets hanged on the ropes. BACKSTABBER—NO! TWIST OF FATE connects, followed by the Swanton Bomb!!! Jeff picks up the win!

Winners: Jeff Hardy & D.H. Smith
Match Rating: **3/4

Still to come, the handicap match that we’ve seen before.


The show is back as Santino Marella enters the arena. Stone Cold Steve Austin is rumored to be here on RAW tonight. He is here to make a formal complaint to the WWE travel department. Santino was unable to show up to Cyber Sunday and was unable to give Steve Austin a piece of his mind.

Glass Shatters that only means one thing. It’s NOT Stone Cold Steve Austin. It’s an Italian wannabe. Oh my God. This was beyond bad. This segment deserves a can of ass whip all over it. Santino gloats some more. Maria comes out in a HOT dress! She says that Stone Cold Steve Austin will be on RAW next week. Santino laughs, saying that Maria believes in anything. He says that Stone Cold will only appear on the cover of the Condemned, next to Lillian’s CD at some discount gas station. Maria saved this abortion, but just barely.

Up next, a new Diva will be crowned.


Todd Grisham is on the stage hyping the finals of the Diva Search. We have Brooke & Eve as the last two diva hopefuls. Both will eventually be hired anyway, so why do we need to go through this competition? No wonder the finals is on RAW instead of a special TV show. The winner of the 2007 Diva Search is Eve. Brooke looks heartbroken as she leaves the stage. You can see Brooke in a few weeks as part of Extreme Expose believe me.

The SAVE US bit plays a second time! The clue from the Pulse Wrestling Chat is 19 Launch. For those curious, November 19th is a Monday and it is after WWE Survivor Series. This is getting interesting.

Oh, it’s Randy. I was focused on Jericho for a moment that I forgot that Randy is in the ring. The main event is NEXT!


A Stone Cold video plays, hyping his return to RAW next Monday. Back ringside as Orton is standing in the ring. Umaga enters the ring as well.

The King of Kings enters, staring a hole into Umaga as Orton lets Umaga have Triple H one-on-one. They BRAWL in the center of the ring! Orton enters as Triple H gets the advantage. HHH throws Orton to the rail and continues to work on Umaga. Umaga gets dispatched and HHH goes back on Orton. Umaga nails the squash to Orton! Pedigree try on Orton, DENIED by Umaga with a reverse Samoan Spike to the back of the head. The numbers game starts to take its toll, but Triple H fights on. SAMOAN DROP by Umaga and Orton works on the legs. Big Splash by Umaga drives the breath out of HH. Orton nails some hard shots, but Umaga continues the assault. Shawn Michaels interferes!

Winners: Randy Orton & Umaga via DQ
Match Rating: *

He knocks Orton out of the ring and he takes it to Umaga. Umaga is tossed out of the ring as they do the crotch chops! D-X is reunited for one night only! Things turn out when Vince wants them to. Next week on RAW is the one night only return of D-Generation X!. I’ll be there with you, so see you NEXT WEEK!

Show Over.

Email me (link below) for your thoughts on tonight’s show. I may include them in next week’s column!

The Inside Pulse

Quick Resultes

Kelly Kelly wins a tri-branded Diva Battle Royal. (NR)
Cody Rhodes & Hardcore Holly d. The World’s Greatest Tag Team (*)
Hornswoggle d. Jonathan Coachman (*)
Lance Cade d. Paul London (*)
Jeff Hardy & D.H. Smith d. Carlito & Mr. Kennedy (**3/4 – Match of the Night)
Randy Orton & Umaga d. Triple H via DQ (Michaels Interference) (*)


Join our newsletter

never miss the latest news, reviews, live event coverage, audio podcasts, exclusive interviews and commentary for Movies, TV, Music, Sports, Comics, Video Games!