Ultimate Marvel Handbook #227

Hey all and welcome to another Marvel Handbook. We have a lot to cover today. I must thank our readers. You guys are keeping us going great. We‘re ahead of schedule. But keep the emails coming. Allow me to bring in Daron. Hey Daron what‘s up.

Bring me in? Where the hell was I?

Not bad here. I‘m having a good week and great day. Very busy week but the Hanbook is on time. I‘ll likely even have another one done in a few days.

Yeah, yeah, you’re life is great, the universe loves you, blah! I’ll be in my corner, reading useless essays, and trying to find time to write the heaps of poetry assignments piling up. But I’m glad your life is all rainbows and virgins…

Luthen email continued

Do most comic writers write for DC, Marvel and Image? Or are they usually contracted for one company at a time? Is there a specific writer over in DC that you’d like to see come over and work at Marvel who hasn’t already?

Many writers work with everyone. If it‘s a bigger name though they normally are signed by a company to just do projects for that company. The same can be said of artist

As for who‘s with DC I want with Marvel? Geoff Johns

For the most part, most writers today work for one company (under contract) or the other with obvious exceptions like PAD who seems to like staying “freelance” so that he can work wherever he wants. Personally, except for the benefits that the writers get (like actual benefits), I have to say I’m not a big fan of the contracts. We’ve seen too many good books die because a writer had to leave it due to contractual obligations…Gotham Central anyone?

As for writers switching, first off, Geoff did a stint at Marvel, that was pretty mediocre (especially when compared to his great work at DC). Geoff’s biggest strength is his attention to detail and history (something Marvel doesn’t really have – at least not one that anyone can really understand or follow).

As for me, like I said, I’d like to see the end of contracts and just let good writers tell good stories at either company, but that’s just me…

What is the lamest super power you’ve seen in comics?

Kate Bishop‘s aiming skill powers

I don’t know about “in” comics, but my parking power has to be really high up there.

With some comics going online-only and some writers/artists charging a few bucks to download entire issues, do you that the actual paper comics will die out?

I think paper comics will always be around in some way. Because it‘s always been the main format. You‘ll always have the comic shops.

If you could make one comic “uncensored/unrated” to bring out its full potential, which would it be? (I’d choose Watchmen myself)

Wolverine. He should be Max.

I’m pretty sure Watchmen wasn’t censored in anyway, I don’t recall it bearing the comics code authority, but I’m not 100% on that. I personally think that the entire industry should be uncensored, it’s not like kids are reading comics…

Which comic do you think is the best to give a non-fan? My sister-in-law is 30 and she enjoys comic-based movies, but I’d like to get her one comic just to see if she’d get hooked. Yeah, a comics addiction is like giving an old man with Alzheimer’s heroin, except it’s not as funny. (Okay, I’m going to hell for that joke)

hehehe. Good question. Here’s one for you though. Which movies did she prefer? IE: some movies are better then others so if say she hated DD she might not like DD the comics.

I know this is a Marvel column, but the best answer I can give you is either Fables or Y: The Last Man from Vertigo. I’ve given these to many noncomic readers (many of them women) and they just love them. These are great for opening the door to other titles.

What happened with Hawkeye and Scarlet Witch. Last I read, they were both married. Now they’re divorced, Hawkeye is dead and Scarlet is evil? I don’t get it.

Hawkeye and Wanda never married each other. That‘s one thing that I must fix here.

Also Wanda isn‘t really evil. She went insane. Caused the death of many and creation of an alternate reality also for a time. Now she‘s in Wundagore

Hawkeye. Brought back to life by Wanda. He‘s in New Avengers as Ronin

Was Toad actually a good guy for a while, and why the hell would anyone, hero or villain want him on their team?

He wasn‘t officially a good guy. He was more of a recruit for X-Men Forever. It was mostly because the movie he was there. But he never turned good. As for why he‘s on teams? Well he has his uses.

Exactly how many Summers relatives are there in MU?

Let’s see Those alive:

3 brothers: Alex/Havok, Scott/Cyclops, Gabe/Vulcan
Scott‘s daughter: Rachel/Marvel Girl
Scott’s son: Nathan/Cable
Wife of Gabe: Deathbird

Most other Summers are dead

Am I the only one who can’t stand Wolverine? They’ve killed the guy for me. He can’t die, he nails every chick he’s with and he gets an attitude with everyone. Seriously, am I just overthinking him, or has he become the “go to guy” for crossovers and such? He’s been around for decades now and still does the same old schtick.

hehe I love Wolverine. So it‘s up to Daron.

Well, I think you pretty much just said the same thing I said a few weeks back when someone asked me if I thought was old Logan was played out. The short answer is yes, he is. Like many Marvel characters Logan needs a major overhaul to make him interesting again, starting with wiping out his inane “Origin,” James Howlett my ass!

Cory emails

Cory’s here…Sup J&D…hope you guys had a great holiday season…here is my start to 2008:

Hey Cory. Hope you didn‘t mind me saving this for this week.

And what if he does?

1- Wasn’t there a rumor about a possible Marvel/DC team-up with Daredevil & Batman, and was it to be current or like a “year one” thing?

The rumor was during one of the cons years ago. It was squashed by DC though. Allow me to go To Bendis for the story

There was a Daredevil/Batman book in 2000 but not likely the one your thinking of.

2- Can I get a run-down of all the problems in the long-term relationship of Cyke & Jean? And do you guys think that they will eventually rekindle things?

Let‘s see

1. Jean keeps dying and coming back. That‘s a problem
2. Emma. Of course she seduced Cyclops to leave Jean
3. Wolverine. He got in the way a few times
4. Psylocke. Anyone else recall the old fling from the 90s
5. Madelyne Pryor. She got in the way of course being married to Scott
6. Sinister. Trust me he‘s a pest to these two

3- I think that DP vs. DD would be a match for the ages, though DP may make DD not only blind, but deaf. Thanks to his mouth. DD could work in Gotham I think, as a hot shot attorney similar to Harvey Dent. The Joker maybe WAY to crazy for DD. But Bats would find similarities in the rogues. Catwoman= Elektra. Typhoid Mary= Poison Ivy, Jester =Riddler, Mr. Fear= Scarecrow, The Owl= the Pengiun, etc.

You bring up a good idea. Deadpool/Daredevil. Now that would be an interesting idea. I mean Deadpool alone should make it funny.

As Daredevil/Batman comparison. It‘s there. There‘s slight differences of course

4- GAMBIT! Ok Daron, about reasons 4, 5, & 6. His origin: WTF is his origin again anyway? Is he a clone of Sinister or not? His weapons of power: Ok, the cards was cool back when I was a teen, but how bout if he used “shuriken” instead? This way it could explode after he slighty impaled someone with it. And finally…”he’s ruined Rogue”? Hmmm, how so? (or in terms of examples do you need another top 10 of ways he has ruined her?) Care to jump in J?

ok I‘ll give an origin story to help out. You two boys play nice though.

Abandoned at birth due to his burning red eyes, the child who would one day become Remy LeBeau was kidnapped from his hospital ward by members of the New Orleans Thieves’ Guild who referred to the child as “le diable blanc” – the white devil. They believed he was the child that had been prophesied to unite the warring Guilds. Soon after, Remy was placed in the care of a gang of street thieves who raised the child and taught him the ways of thievery.

Later, when he was around ten years old, Remy attempted to pick the pocket of Jean-Luc LeBeau, then-patriarch of the Thieves’ Guild. Jean-Luc took the boy in off the streets and adopted him into his own family. As part of a peace pact between the Thieves’ Guild and their rivals, the Assassin’s Guild, a marriage was arranged between Remy and Bella Donna Boudreaux, the granddaughter of the head of the Assassin’s Guild. However, Bella Donna’s brother Julien objected to the marriage and challenged Gambit to a duel. Remy killed Julien in self-defense, but was excommunicated and banished from New Orleans in an attempt to maintain the non-aggression pact between the two guilds.

As to his power, yeah him throwing just about anything other than cards would be an improvement. As for Rogue, she’s just been ruined by proxy. All of her stories in recent years were all tied up with his. She just used to be an interesting character on her own. It’s kind of like when you have a great friend who marries a controlling bitch. Soon afterwards your great friend becomes a little bitch as well.

By the way, I’m in no way jaded…

5- The Fury Files: Though I know that they are old friends, but why does The Human Torch & Spidey meet up every Christmas?

It‘s a tradition. The two being both young heroes (when they started) they got along pretty well. They became fast friends and decided to meet once a year.

6- Besides the old Jean DeWolfe saga, how’s the relationship between Daredevil and Spidey been since they met?

They used to get along really well. Well until OMD. They both knew each others Ids even when times where rough for either of them. They always seemed to work together well and knew the truth.

7- Although I wasn’t a fan of Warpath, mostly because I think he was spawned to replace his brother with a chip on his shoulder, he has become one of my fave X-Men recently. Maybe it’s the attitude, the knives or moments to shine, but what has made him so likeable as of late to you guys?

Well Warpath wasn‘t really like this until recently in Uncanny. Brubaker has made the character into an actual character you can like and enjoy. It‘s like some characters can‘t get fans until the right writer comes on. That‘s what happened here.

8- OMG! Everywhere you look now in Messiah Complex, someone is either hurt/dying (Caliban, Deathstrike, Nightcrawler, Hellion), getting captured (Madrox, Layla), or turning traitor (Gambit, Sunfire, Lady Mastermind, Mystique, Cable-believed to be, and now Bishop?) What’s going on? I’m loving the story but…it’s one hell of a cliffhanger. I also love the fact that Cyke and Charles are at odds, and the immediate introduction of the X-Force team.

Good once. Alright Messiah complex: Best X-over in years BTW. This is like Avengers Disasssembled in many ways. (in fact promos called it X-Men Disassembled) Everything is falling apart and lives are going to be lost. In the end the X-Men will split up for a time to gather again likely in issue 500 of Uncanny.

9- Also, where has New Excalibur been in all of the Messiah Complex?

Disbanded actually. After Die by the Sword the team disbanded. A few members joined the Exiles in Sage and Psylocke. Longshot and Dazzler went off.

10- My Skrull List: 1- Maria Hill, 2- Hawkeye, 3- Prof. X, 4- Gauntlet, 5-Slapstick, 6- Hank Pym. Also, wasn’t Jessica Jones there when Dr. Strange did that spell to make sure no new Avengers were Skrulls? I think that BP is doing amazing things either thanks to the writing staff or him excelling to be Marvel’s Batman.

Yep Jess was there. But I still think she‘s a Skrull. More then Hawkeye. Hill= very possible. Xavier=not sure. Gauntlet= odd but sure. Slapstick=really?

11- In terms of comic deaths and all out brawls between him and Wolverine, doesn’t Sabretooth’s death seem like a let-down or at least kinda watered down?—> (Never answered from Jason’s question last week, and i wanna know also.)

Could‘ve been a longer and better fight. I can‘t argue that. I mean for it being Wolverine‘s arch enemy dying. He went out quick.

12- In terms of Marvel, what makes a parody character “legal or accepted” by let’s say DC? Ex. Nighthawk=Batman, Whiteface=Joker. Also can I get a top 10 of Marvel’s parody characters of DC ones?

Good one

1. Hyperion =Superman
2. Nighthawk=Batman
3. Dr. Spectrum=Green Lantern
4. Golden Archer=Green Arrow
5. Power Princess= Wonder Woman
6. Blur/Whizzer=Flash
7. Amphibain= Aquaman
8. Tom Thumb=Atom
9. Whiteface=Joker
10. Emil Burbank= Luthor

13- About the top 10 Lamest super-villians? Who are The Eye, Tiger Moth, Needle, Asbetos Man, Mr. Doll, & Gibbon?

The Eye: This one I think I meant Eye Scream: Eye-Scream had the superhuman mutant ability to turn into any flavor of ice cream he wishes. He could “melt” himself down with the assistance of his (I kid you not) unstable molecule refrigeration unit. This allowed him to ooze through barriers such as bars or underneath locked doors.

Tiger Moth: Another error: likely meant Flying Tiger: The Flying Tiger wears armor which allows him to fly at perhaps 100 mph, and presumably grants him some degree of superhuman strength and durability, though he can be flattened by a single punch from the likes of Iron Man. He is an experienced aerial combatant, able to maneuver swiftly and agilely, and has sharpened claws on his gloves. It is unclear whether he has any powers not granted from his suit.

Needle: Ability to paralyze his foes with his one good eye. Stronger and more spry than a typical man his age. Wields a yard long needle.

Asbestos Man: foremost analytical chemist, Kasloff felt someone with his scientific ability should be treated like a king. Embarking upon a life of crime using a liquid solvent he developed, Kasloff soon realized that he needed an experienced criminal’s help to execute his heists. Kasloff concluded that he would earn the underworld’s respect if he defeated Human Torch, so he developed a suit of flame-resistant super-asbestos and confronted the Torch.. Unaffected by Torch’s powers, Asbestos Man scored a victory over the hero, and soon plotted to rob the State National Bank. But the Torch used his powers to consume all the oxygen in the area, forcing Asbestos Man to surrender. Asbestos Man confessed to his crimes and was taken to prison.

Mr. Doll: As Mister Doll, he used a magic talisman (doll) that he could rapidly mold at will to mimic the facial appearance of any other human (and possibly other beings). By concentrating on the doll or by touching it at various points of its body, he could cause great pain in its target being.

Gibbon: Seemingly born a mutant, The Gibbon later joined a circus where he did well as an acrobat…His powers were later enhanced by a potion given to him by Kraven to “Unleash the Beast within”!

14- Top agile?? I say 1- Nightcrawler, 2-Spidey, 3- Beast, 4- Daredevil, 5- Wolverine, 6- Cap, 7-Tasky, 8- Deadpool, 9- BP, and 10- Black Cat??? How’s that one?

Hmmm not bad. Could be very accurate with the list.

15- Since Quicksilver fought The Flash, and is the equivalent of him, how could Fast Forward, Runner, and Makkari be faster that Pietro?

Fast Forward= Barry Allen. Well that‘s what was always believed. Makkari is an Eternal. He‘s likely faster then Pietro in reality.

Um Pietro got his ass handed to him by the Flash so I’m not sure why its surprising he gets his handed to him by anyone else.

16- A great question was asked awhile back, how come Wolvie’s teeth aren’t adamantium laced? (One can guess that it’s not as appealing as having pearly whites).

You could have it Cory. Would make some sense

17- Since I asked for a top 10 on who from Marvel could give Batman a great battle, how bout one for Superman and Wonder Woman?

Superman:

1. Hulk
2. Thor
3. Gladiator
4. Sentry
5. Hyperion
6. Beta Ray Bill
7. Thanos
8. Abomination
9. Silver Surfer
10. Onslaught

Wonder Woman

1. She-Hulk
2. Ms Marvel
3. Thundra
4. Rogue
5. Phoenix
6. Invisible Woman
7. Spider-Woman
8. Emma Frost
9. Storm
10. Marvel Girl

You know…I think I’m just going to let these go with a blind eye…

That’ll be it for me this entry. Until then thanks a mil, make mine Marvel, and see ya in 7!

See you next time Cory

Brand New Day synopsis

Amazing Spider-Man 547: Robbie takes over as Jonah is taken to the hospital. Pete is sent out for photos. Lily and Harry talk about the mugging. We watch the mugger meet with another crook and find one of Spidey’s Webspinners. Spidey finds them and follows the one. Jonah’s wife thinks of selling the paper. Mr Negative captures the one goon only for Spidey to come in and stop him and see the Lemurian tablet. The mugger his again. May finds Pete missing. Spidey talks to Bruno Karnete (the goon from earlier) only to find out he’s Maggia and his buddies are targets. Spidey goes to save them only to get shot at before being knocked out with the others.

Aftersmash

Incredible Hercules #113: Ares goes to see Hydra. Hercules and Cho debate the next move as Herc contacts his sister. Ares uses the Hydra blood on bullets to use on Herc and tells of a story about Herc’s past. Wonder Man battles Hercules only for Ares to shoot Herc. Herc takes Ares out as he’s driven mad. Cho takes Herc to go after SHIELD.

Warbound #2: The gamma wave effects many people. Warbound meet the Leader only to watch him escape. Warbound deal with soldiers only to team up as the gamma effected insects attack. Warbound save lives. Kate help Hiriom as he deals with a way to help the people escape as another gamma creature attacks.

Miek tells SHIELD of HiriomL Hiriom fights along his people in the Spike Wars. In the end Hiriom failed to kill the Red King

Messiah Complex Synopsis

New X-Men #46: We learn how Mystique took out Sinister. X-Force takes on the Marauders. The X-Men arrive to help. Mystique uses the baby on Rogue. The New X-Men battle Predator X. Cable takes out Riptide before he can kill Wolfsbane. Gambit takes the baby. Xavier shows up and takes the baby leaving Gambit to care for Rogue. Predator X goes after the wounded only for Pixie to teleport everyone to the fight. Xavier gives Cable the baby to care for as Bishop and Predator X attack.

Initiative Synopsis

New Warriors #8: Midnights Fire battles Night Thrasher. Silhouette tries to stop them. The Warriors discuss terrorism. Ultra Girl trains her new team as Justice and Rage watch and think of joining the New Warriors. Thrasher offers Mightnight fire an alliance only for Midnight Fire having to think it over as he goes to meet a mystery figure

Penance #4: The FF meets with Tony and Osborn about Doom. Penance contacts them all and tells them what his plan is. Penance arrives in Latveria. Reed contacts Doom. Penance and Doom battle with Penance winning and going to meet Nitro.

That‘s it for this week. A good amount of emails. I left one out. We‘ll get it next time out I promise. So Daron what did you think?

I think it’s time for me to get back to my homework…

Well I enjoyed it as always. In fact I’m hoping to enjoy the next issue too. This is fun being ahead. I hope it stays this way. Care to sign off Daron?

It would be interesting if I could sign off Daron, but then really, who would I be?

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