Alright, so the horror genre has always taken things just one step too far. In the past couple years it has been the curse of remakes and one too many sequels just ruining everything. Back in 2005, there was a very short-lived television series entitled A Nightmare On Elm Street: Real Nightmares which lasted all of six episodes. It seems a spin-off on Freddy just wasn’t what people were looking for. But back in the late eighties, a spin-off for another horror franchise was a bit more successful. Jason Voorhees wasn’t involved and I’m not so sure it would make it long today before being canceled, but it brings back memories for me and I still love it no mater how cheesy it is.
Micki Foster and her distant cousin Ryan Dallion have inherited an antique shop that was owned by their late uncle Lewis Vendredi. They believe they’ve simply got a business to run or one to sell off once everything is settled, but there’s something they don’t know: Uncle Lewis made a deal with the devil long ago to gain the ultimate fortune he has long wished for. The deal, however, requires Vendredi to sell cursed objects in his store that will do the devil’s bidding. Everything was running smoothly, but when Vendredi broke the deal his death occurred and his soul belonged to the devil. The antique shop still has cursed objects that Micki and Ryan unknowingly sell to happy buyers.
Along the way of making their business work, an old friend of their uncle named Jack Marshak approached them and advised them of the awful things they were selling. The group now is determined to get the items back and store them safely in a vault underneath the shop that will keep the evil powers at bay. Their only hope is to track down all those who purchased items from the shop, buy them back, and put them in the vault before anything too horrible happens. The only problem is that there are only three of them and way too many items to get back quickly so some evil and awful things are already going on.
Let me just be the first to tell you that fans of the films hoping they’ll get random appearances by Jason or maybe even hoping he’s going to kill countless people each episode, are setting themselves up for disappointment. He’s not going to show up. People aren’t going to go camping at Crystal Lake. And it was way too early for Jason to appear in space after being cryogenically frozen for years. In fact, there isn’t even a real reason for the series to have the title it does, but true horror fans will understand why. If you take the original owner of the antique shop and translate his last name, Vendredi, into English then you have “Friday.” TA-DA! Kind of neat huh? Hold on everyone and don’t get your panties in a bunch because it has nothing to do with the film franchise. Believe you’ll be missing out on some good stuff if you give up on it before even checking it out.
The series has a great idea – the antique shop/devil debacle – and gives the cousins and their newfound friend a lot of material to work with for countless episodes. Don’t expect much in way of scares and be prepared to sit through some rather bad acting and cheesiness during the first four or five episodes, but it gets much better and will turn into one of the best horror-themed series that fans of the genre could ever wish for. You’re going to find yourself truly caring for the characters and hoping they succeed in their quests before more anger, thievery, deceit, and (yes, even) murder happens. Giving this series the title of Friday the 13th had to really be more of a marketing ploy then anything, but it doesn’t matter. It’s a great series that wouldn’t last five episodes today simply because people wouldn’t be willing to give it a chance. But thankfully enough, Paramount has graced fans with a series we’ve missed for close to twenty years.
Episodes
Disc One:
The Inheritance: Distant cousins Ryan Dallion and Micki Foster discover they’ve inherited their uncle’s antiques shop, but the place comes with a disturbing curse that will force them to retrieve all the goods they’ve sold off.
The Poison Pen: The cousins and Jack must track an antique quill pen that grants wishes in exchange for someone’s life. The search leads them to a monastery that is famed for its eerily accurate prophecies.
Cupid’s Quiver: Love knows no bounds when an unappealing slob gets hold of an ancient Cupid statue that has women falling down dead at his feet.
A Cup Of Time: One sip from a haunted tea cup lets the user take youth and talent from an unfortunate victim. But will one senior citizen take her thirst for fame too far?
Disc Two:
Hellowe’en: Micki and Ryan throw a Halloween party in order to meet the neighbors, but they end up with a guest they didn’t expect – the evil spirit of their Uncle Vendredi.
The Great Montarro: Magic makes mischief when the cousins and Jack try to uncover who is using some cursed “magic boxes” to make one person invincible while another suffers all the harm.
Doctor Jack: The scalpel of Jack the Ripper falls into the hands of a physician who discovers he can use it miraculously heal one of his patients – as long as another pays the ultimate price.
Shadow Boxer: Its a total knockout when a boxer uses haunted gloves to make himself invincible in the ring, and its up to Jack and Ryan to figure out how to stop the menace and his devious shadow.
Root Of All Evil: Evil sprouts in the form of a mulcher that turns human flesh into money, and Micki is forced into making a big decision in her relationship with Lloyd.
Disc Three:
Tales Of The Undead: It’s vengeance superhero-style when an embittered comic book writer gets hold of a cursed comic that turns him into Ferrus the Invincible.
Scarecrow: A killer scarecrow makes sure the harvest of one small town is trimmed perfectly – as long as three human heads are lopped off as well – and now its looking for Micki.
Faith Healer: Jack is faced with a life-and-death decision when a friend dying of cancer asks him to look into a “faith healer” with a glove that can transfer all physical ills to another person.
The Baron’s Bride: Micki and Ryan take a frightening trip back in time to track a bloodthirsty female vampire and a brooch with deadly transformational powers.
Bedazzled: A cursed lantern shines a light on two wicked treasure hunters who are using the item to kill divers involved in their finds, but Micki’s not about to let the crime get washed away.
Disc Four:
Vanity’s Mirror: Cupid’s arrows kill when a disgruntled high school student uses a sinister compact to make everyone reflected in it die for love of her.
Tattoo: A set of tattoo needles leave a permanently lethal mark on its victims when a compulsive gambler uses them to increase his winnings.
Brain Drain: A torture device hidden away in a museum warehouse gets a second “life” when a dimwitted man uses it to suck the intelligence from others for his own devious purposes.
The Electrocutioner: After a condemned man mysteriously survives a trip to the electric chair, he escapes jail and seeks vengeance on those who put him behind bars – as well as anyone who gets in his way.
Disc Five:
The Quilt Of Hathor: A cursed quilt that allows whoever sleeps under it to dream their enemies to death appears in a secluded community, and Ryan’s romance with a woman there may put him under wraps for good.
Quilt Of Hathor: The Awakening: Jack and Micki discover that Ryan’s future father-in-law is using the quilt to frame Ryan for some mysterious deaths, and he must engage in brutal combat to prove his innocence.
Double Exposure: A TV anchorman is getting amazing ratings for his exclusive contact with the Machete Killer, but a cursed camera may expose why the two have such a close relationship.
The Pirate’s Promise: Micki and Ryan are drawn by a haunted foghorn to a small community where someone is using it to summon the ghost of a pirate in order to find where his bloody treasure lies.
Disc Six:
Badge Of Honor: It’s the ultimate showdown when Micki’s ex-boyfriend shows up to track a vigilante-style killer, while a jealous Ryan suspects him of yet another sinister crime.
Pipe Dream: Ryan’s father, Ray, reveals that he’s recently found phenomenal success for his inventions, but the trio is suspicious when his rivals are shut down in a particularly gruesome manner.
What A Mother Wouldn’t Do: A cursed cradle from the Titanic caries a terrible legacy that has two parents doing the unthinkable in order to save their child’s life.
Bottle Of Dreams: An urn puts Micki an Ryan in a terrifying trance that forces them to relive their most horrifying moments over and over until they die – unless Jack can find a way to shatter the spell.
The episodes are shown in 4:3 Anamorphic Widescreen format and they really show their age a lot in this set. Not much has been done to fix them up obviously, and it is evident that they’re twenty years old. Still, they get the job done and are adequate enough for the material presented.
The episodes are heard in Dolby Digital Mono Sound and it also isn’t much to get excited about. Sadly these aren’t in surround sound to get the full effect of some spooky music and sound effects all around the room which is what horror truly is all about.
Original Network Launch Promos – These are the original commercials that aired to promote the series and they are pretty corny, but fun.
Sales Presentation – Ten minutes of press releases, reviews, and letting us know some of the best episodes from the series. If you’re wondering though, the best episodes are the pilot and everything after the first eight or nine episodes.
Friday the 13th: The Series is not going to be something that everyone will enjoy. Hell, it also isn’t going to be something that every horror fan will care for, but it is a series that should at least be given a chance. It is corny, cheesy, dark, demented, murderous, bloody, off the wall, and everything that an old eighties’ slasher was made of. Give it a shot as a rental some time and you’re sure to fall in love with it or at least want for some more. The end of season one is where things really get moving nicely and it continues over into seasons two and three (which I can only hope are quickly on their way to our homes). As for the special features…well, it can’t all be perfect now can it? Hardly over fifteen minutes of extra anything, but we get a whopping twenty-six episodes that will keep you busy for a long while. If only we could get more great series like this on today’s television. No, all we horror fans have to look forward to are things like Scare Tactics and that’s just an incredible waste of time and space. Oh well, I can always fall back on this DVD copy of Friday the 13th: The Series.
Chh-chh-chh! Ahh-ahh-ahh! Oh, sorry.
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Paramount Friday The 13th The Series: The First Season. Created by: Frank Mancuso Jr. & Larry B. Williams. Starring: Louise Robey, Chris Wiggins, John D. LeMay, and more. Running time: 1179 minutes on 6 discs. Rating: Not Rated. Released on DVD: September 23, 2008. Available at Amazon.com
