The Way Too Long Review for Legends of Wrestling: Sgt. Slaughter & Ric Flair

Reviews, Wrestling DVDs

Skipping the boring roundtable.

Match #1
Sgt. Slaughter vs. Mike Rotundo
5/12/82 Mid Atlantic Wrestling

Lockup and Slaughter misses a clubbing blow on the ropes.  Circle and lockup leads to Rotundo getting an armdrag.  Another lockup and Slaughter gets a hiptoss.  Rotundo follows up with a couple armdrags, but Slaughter ties him up in the ropes and gets an elbow to the back of the head.  Snapmare into a chinlock by Sarge.  Headlock takedown by Slaughter for two, rolled over for two by Rotundo, but Sarge holds the headlock.  Rotundo turns it over for two again so Slaughter gets to his feet and punches Rotundo in the nose.  Slam into the corner, reversed by Rotundo into a backdrop.  Scoopslam by Rotundo gets two.  Slaughter fights back with a low punch and gives Rotundo his own slam, but a kneedrop misses.  Waistlock takedown by Slaughter gets all sloppy looking and they end up in the ropes.  Stomp to the face, then a big palm slap to the chest.  Rotundo fights back and slugs it out.  Shoulderblocks in the corner, then he fights off a Sarge comeback with a small package for two.  Slaughter ties him in the ropes and clubs him in the chest.  Rotundo ducks a clothesline and gets a sunset flip for two.  Punches in the corner, but the ref pulls him off.  Slaughter gets a cheap shot in, so Rotundo goes back to more punches in the corner.  The ref pulls him off again, so Slaughter uses a, get this, clinched fist to get the pin.  Yep, a punch.
1/2* Boring, heatless, average midcard Mid Atlantic TV match.

Match #2: WWE Championship, Texas Death Match
(c) Bob Backlund vs. Sgt. Slaughter
9/24/83 WWE Philadelphia Spectrum
Special Referee: Tony Garea

This was one of the last feuds booked by Vince McMahon Sr, who kind of knew that junior would be moving the belt off of Backlund and thus was hand-selecting his final opponents, so as to insure that Backlund would have plenty of money if he left the company.  It’s amazing that Vincent K. McMahon and Vincent J. McMahon could be from the same family tree.  I’ve never heard anyone say a single negative thing about the elder McMahon.  Meanwhile, his son is such an egomaniac that they allegedly have to call off meetings if he so much as hiccups.  Anyway, Backlund is incredibly over, which goes against everything people say about him these days.  Even Backlund himself has said something to the effect of “the only person I was over with was Vince Sr.”  I don’t get it myself.  He was a really good draw and still likely the best wrestler ever for blow off matches.  You can get the first chapter of this feud in the History of the WWE Championship set, which I gave ****1/2 to, which makes it one of the highest ranked matches that is exclusive to that set.  You can buy that set now at Wal-Mart for $13.00, which is a pretty good deal.

Falls count anywhere here.  Lockup to start and Sarge slugs it out.  Headlock and a punch by Sarge, who looks like he’s in the best shape of his career here.  Elbow to Backlund’s throat, then he tosses Backlund to the floor and dumps him over the security rail.  Backlund climbs back over the rail, only to eat the worst elbow off the apron ever by Slaughter.  Maybe he was brushing some lint off of Bob.  Slaughter comes in and stomps Backlund, then covers for two on the floor.  He tries to ram Backlund into the post but Backlund pushes him into it.  Slaughter fights back and loads up a piledriver on the floor, but Backlund backdrops out of it.  Is his backdrop called the Backlunddrop?  Yes, horrible, I agree.  Back in, Bob punches Slaughter and clotheslines him.  Stomp of the face, then a catapult into the turnbuckle.  Slam into the canvas by Bobby, then a head-cruncher that Sarge oversells by flipping off the mat and over the top rope.  Backlund gets to the apron and punts Sarge in the face as he’s getting up.  Backlund tosses Sarge back in, but then reverses a whip by Sarge and dumps him again.  Backlund decides to pay tribute to Slaughter’s horrible, business exposing elbow from earlier by firing one of his own.  He tries to send Slaughter into the post but Sarge reverses and Backlund eats it.  Back in, Sarge climbs but Bob catches him and tosses him off the top for two.  Backlund goes for a scoopslam but Sarge falls on top for two.  JYD-style crawling headbutt by Bob, which Sarge oversells.  Lockup and Sarge goes for a suplex, but Backlund reverses into a small package for two.  Sunset flip by Sarge gets two, with Backlund clapping his legs on Sarge’s head to escape.  That’s one of those moves a lot of guys use today that is never sold.  It’s not just a kick-out, it’s an offensive maneuver and it should be treated like one.  Hell, the move has underutilized potential as a double-knockout spot.  Slaughter adjusts his gimmicked boot and then kicks Backlund with it.  Backlund to the apron, where Slaughter suplexes him back into the ring and slowly covers for two.  Shoot off and a dropkick by Sarge gets two.  Sarge stalks Backlund around and goes for the Cobra Clutch but Backlund avoids it.  Bob goes for a suplex but can barely get him up and nearly invents the impailer DDT in the process.  It gets two.  Meeting of the minds and both guys are out.  Stomp by Sarge gets two.  He climbs and hits a stomp off the second turnbuckle for two with a hand on the rope.  Backlund walks around all crazy like he doesn’t know where he is.  Clothesline from Sarge, then he gets greedy and goes for another but Backlund ducks and hits a crossbody… for the pin?  Sarge had his foot on the ropes, but Backlund is still the winner.  Sarge gets pissy and clotheslines referee Tony Garea afterwards, but Backlund saves.
*3/4 An enormous disappointment.  These guys just could not get anything going.  This was supposed to be a Texas Death Match, but for whatever reason this was instead very standard, very mundane, and incredibly bland.  Both guys looked totally lost out there.  Maybe I was spoiled by their match from the WWE Championship DVD, but I always score matches in these sets on their own, and this was completely forgettable.

Match #3
Sgt. Slaughter vs. The Iron Sheik
5/12/84 Madison Square Garden

Sheik runs down before Slaughter’s music stops and tries to jump him, but Slaughter hears him coming, beats him down, and slams him.  He rips Sheik’s robe up, then stomps him some more.  Fans love it.  Wind-up punch, then a snapmare and some kneedrops.  Slaughter spits on him and the fans are absolutely bonkers for Sarge, reacting huge to everything he does.  Shoot off and a back-elbow, then he dumps Sheik.  He doesn’t wait one second and bails himself to smack him around on the floor.  He tosses Sheik back in and drops an elbow on him off the top.  Face-twist with the flat of his boot, then some more big punches.  Rake of the back by Sarge, but he gets caught charging in the corner.  Sheik smacks him in the back and kicks him in the face, then stomps at his face.  Shoot off and a backdrop by Sheik, then some spitting and snot rockets.  Sheik throws Sarge up over the turnbuckle and into the post, then stomps some more.  Choke on the ropes by Sheik, then a head of steam.  Sheik taunts Slaughter and stomps him some more, then spits on him.  Some fan gets pissed and throws their umbrella in the ring, which glances off of Sheik.  More kicking by Sheik, using the point of his spiky-toed boots.  Sheik goes for an elbowdrop by Sarge moves out of the way.  Sheik loads up a suplex but Sarge reverses into one of his own, which pops the poopie out of the crowd.  Double-KO follows.  Both guys up and Sarge smacks Sheik around, but Sheik kicks with the point of his boot.  Sarge hulks up and brawls Sheik down.  Sheik tries to pray to Allah, but Allah is busy and Sarge mounts some punches, then slams Sheik’s head into the canvas.  Big clothesline, which was one of Slaughter’s big moves during this period.  Sarge takes off one of his boots and attempts to kill Sheik with it.  The ref tries to stop him but Sarge won’t be denied and he beats the holy fuck out of Sheik with it, getting disqualified as a result.  Lame ending to an otherwise hot match.  The dumb shit announcers are confused by the ending, thinking Sheik might have been counted out when he bailed from the ring to escape the beating.  I liked Gorilla Monsoon as an announcer but his demented “the babyfaces can do no wrong” stuff was downright disturbing.  Makes you wonder what kind of messages it sent to impressionable kids.  Then again, that might explain why I’m such a hateful, smart-assed prick.
***1/4 Nice, intense match with a hot crowd and good pacing.  At the risk of getting placed in the camel clutch, having my back broken, and being fucked in the ass, I will say that I’m not a big Iron Sheik fan.  I actually think he’s one of the worst guys to come out of Verne Gagne’s training camp.  Moved around and threw his punches like he was made of wood.  But he was always good at timing the heat sections and making sure the babyface made his comeback at the right time.  We’ll hear more about him when we get to his disc.  The rematch from a week later is on the Greatest Superstars of the 80s, though it’s not as good.

Match #4: Boot Camp Match
Sgt. Slaughter vs. Col. DeBeers
12/13/88 Superclash III

Who’s DeBeers’ favorite football team?  DE BEERS!

Holy crap, that was the lamest joke I’ve ever written.  Every time I think I’ve hit rock bottom, I turn around and top it.

DeBeers has a young Diamond Dallas Page with him here, who was basically a Michael Hayes rip-off at this point in his career.  He didn’t start wrestling until years later.  Slaughter is a bit pudgy here, but he manages to slug it out and smack DeBeers with his riding crop.  Shoot off and a clothesline with it by Slaughter.  DeBeers punches Sarge in the gut to take control, then brawls him around a bit.  DeBeers takes his belt off and starts to choke Sarge with it.  Clubbing blows from DeBeers, then he beats on Sarge with his riding crop.  Slam into the turnbuckle, but the crowd’s USA chant gets Sarge back into it.  He hits a snapmare and a stomp.  Sarge dumps DeBeers over the top rope, then slams him into the post.  Sarge weakly punches him down and covers for two.  Weak brawling by DeBeers to come back, then he smacks him with thing that holds up the ropes that are there in place of a guard-rail.  DDP passes DeBeers a helmet, which he puts on.  He then hits a battering ram with it.  He charges again but Sarge moves out of the way and DDP gets knocked off the apron.  Sarge headbutts DeBeers with it a few times.  Shoot off and a clothesline, then he calls for the cobra clutch.  By the way, Sarge’s hair is HILARIOUS!  Like Bill Murray’s in the movie Kingpins.  All over the place.  Sarge slaps on the cobra clutch, but DDP is who looks like a chick from behind, calls someone down to help, but it’s too late as Sarge wins.  Iron Sheik and Adnan El-Kaissee (the future General Adnan) hit the ring to beat down Sarge.  The Guerrero brothers hit the ring to make the save.
DUD Horrible match.  Both guys were well past their prime.  Sarge is sucking wind after only a couple minutes of action.  He sure seemed like he was on about to retire by this point.  Two years later he would be WWE Champion.  Go figure.

Match #5: NWA World Heavyweight Championship
(c) Ric Flair vs. Lex Luger
12/28/88 Starrcade
As Seen On: The Best of Starrcade

Very interesting match-up if you know the whole back story to it.  Luger had been penciled in to win this match and the title, but Ted Turner had bought WCW about one month before this and put a man named Jim Herd in charge.  Herd put a freeze on all title changes until focus groups could be used to decide which wrestlers they would rather see be champions.  I shit you not.  The only exception was the TV title, so as to have at least one historic moment at Starrcade that year.  The idea to do focus testing was dropped when Ricky Steamboat arrived on the scene and was given a run with the title because he had recently been on the more popular WWE programming at the time.  Of course, the bad part was this totally destroyed Luger’s run.  Luger had broke from the Horsemen and challenged Flair at the Great American Bash.  Luger had the match won with Flair in the torture rack, but the bookers took advantage of a weird law in the state of Maryland that says any blood would result in a the company being fined.  Since the fans knew about the blood rule, the bookers turned ‘fine’ to ‘immediate match stoppage’ which gave them an excuse to keep the feud going through December.

When Luger dropped this match (sorry for the spoiler) via pinfall, he looked like the biggest choke artist ever.  And this was made worse by the fact that he won the United States Championship two months later with little effort.  He went on to have the longest reign anyone has had with the belt, but the fact that he couldn’t beat Ric Flair after all the build and hype then easily won a secondary championship made him look like a total wank stain.  For all the venom wrestlers show towards Luger these days, I don’t think anyone can say that he was given a fair shot at being the main guy in the company at any point.  When he did get a run with the belt, he was turned heel for no logical reason.  At that point, Flair had left WCW and the fans were a bit pissed about it.  Luger as a babyface champion might have softened the blow.  Instead, his heel turn tanked attendance and left him unable to draw and profit from his run.  He’s not the most popular guy in the business, but he sure was booked into oblivion on multiple occasions.

To the match.  Circle to start, lockup, and Luger shoots off but Ric grabs the ropes to stop himself.  He poses to huge heat.  Production value are really bad, with shaky hand cameras and some really bad wide shots.  To the corner where Flair teases a clean break but throws a punch.  Luger grabs at Flair only to get chopped and shot off.  He holds the ropes, but Luger dumps him over the top instead.  I guess that wasn’t a disqualification during this period.  Hard to keep up with when it was and wasn’t a DQ.  Lockup and Flair gets a hammerlock, reversed by Luger, and Ric grabs the ropes.  Lockup and Luger grabs a headlock.  Shoot off and Luger gets a shoulderblock.  Luger asks for a test of strength but Flair is too smart for that and chops him instead, then gets a shoulderblock, but Luger gets up and powerslams Flair, nearly botching it, and Flair bails.  Jim Ross covers for Luger on commentary.  Flair returns only to get press slammed for two.  Flair holds onto the ropes, and as soon as he lets go Luger pounces with a wristlock.  Shoot to the corner and Flair oversells it with gusto.  Arm ringer but Flair escapes and chops Luger.  This only pisses Lex off, causing Flair to beg off and bail.  Luger gives chase.  They return only for Flair to chop him again, only for Lex to shoot Flair into the corner again.  Flair collapses and Lex mounts a grounded hammerlock.  Luger works it too instead of just lying there like a lump.  It’s an art that’s lost on holds these days.  Luger reverses a comeback with a hiptoss, but Flair thumbs the eye to apparently take control.  Flair chops away, but Lex hulks up and Flair bails again.  Lex catches him on the outside and applies a hammerlock on the steel railing.  He then rams Flair into the post then tosses him back into the ring.  Back in, Lex hooks in an armbar.  Flair is sure doing everything to make Lex look like the real deal.  Flair counters out and ducks one clothesline but eats another for two.  Flair bails to the apron only to be caught and suplexed back in for two.  Elbow drop misses, and Lex sells it like death.  Flair kicks Lex in the gut and hits a kneelift.  He then dumps Lex to the floor, then rams him into the rail a few times.  He returns to the ring, but Lex beats the count.  Back in, snapmare and a kneedrop.  Another snapmare and a double stomp.  Flair seems to be stalling a little too much.  In the corner, Flair chops away.  That didn’t work before, and it doesn’t work now as Lex hulks up again. Luger punches away, Flair hits a shoulderblock, then Lex grabs a sleeper.  Flair escapes it with a back suplex and both guys are out.  Flair recovers first and goes for the figure four, but Lex catches him in a small package for two.  Chop by Flair and a snapmare.  Flair climbs but Lex catches him and superplexes him for two.  Luger is feeling it and puts on his own figure-four, drawing a few near falls.  J.J. Dillon.  Flair grabs the ropes but the referee kicks his foot off.  In the old days, you needed your arm or leg to cross the plane of the rope to cause a break, and just getting a hand on the rope was not enough.  Luger punches Flair in the corner, then blatantly elbows the referee.  They said it was accidental.  Who the fuck did Lex think was talking to him?  Flair then dumps Luger over the top rope… which apparently is a disqualification… but the referee doesn’t see it and Luger returns and climbs the top rope.  Crossbody hits for two.  Flair goes for a hiptoss but Lex turns it into a backslide for two.  Ten punch in the corner and a hard whip to the corner sends Flair up and down.  Flair to the apron where Lex suplexes him back in for two.  Flair chops away but Luger no-sells it and press slams Flair.  Powerslam and Lex calls for the torture rack, but J.J. gets on the apron.  Flair trips up Lex and pathetically chairs him in the knee.  One of the worst looking chair shots I’ve seen.  The average person likely has more force sitting down on a chair then Flair used there.  Ugh.  Flair back in where he drops his weight on the knee.  Luger stands up only for Flair to kick at the knee.  Chopblock and Flair stomps away.  Kneedrop to the injured knee and the figure four.  To Luger’s credit, he’s sold this whole sequence like death.  Luger fights back and turns him over, causing the hold to be released.  Flair goes to work the knees some more.  Snapmare and a kneedrop to the injured knee again and Flair climbs again.  Again, he’s caught by Luger and tossed off.  Luger collapses afterwards.  Flair dumps Luger through the ropes, then tries a hangman but Luger holds onto the ropes.  Press slam hits, but again he collapses after the move and Flair dumps him again.  Luger up quickly and he hits a sunset flip for two.  Flair hits a running forearm, but Luger no-sells it and Ric bounces off him in a cool spot.  Another ten-punch, then a shoot to the corner and a clothesline for two.  Powerslam and Lex again calls for the rack.  He slaps it on and holds onto for a bit, but his leg buckles on him and Flair lands on top, putting his feet on the rope for the pin.  Fans are PISSED!  Luger forgets to sell the knee injury while he complains.  What happened, did the buckling cause it to pop back into place?  Horrible.
***1/2 Not bad.  I have three complaints.  (1) Like the match with Sting from Clash at the Champions, they kept running through the same sequence of moves and repeating them over and over instead of using any type of variety.  That said, they did so in much better fashion then the Sting match.  (2) The chair shot was incredibly weak and took me out of the match.  (3) Luger didn’t sell the knee injury after the match ended.  Considering his brilliant sell-job to that point, that really irked me.  That said, this was entertaining, even if it made Luger look like a chump in the end.

Match #6: Thunderdome Cage Match
Ric Flair & Sting vs. The Great Muta & Terry Funk
10/28/89 Halloween Havoc
Guest Referee: Bruno Sammartino

I’ve actually never seen this match.  It’s “throw in the towel” rules.  Flair & Sting have Ole Anderson with them, while the heels have Gary Hart.  Cage is huge and electrified.  Oh, and covered in the Halloween-type decorations.  Well that’s just fucking stupid.  In more ways then one, as one of the decorations catches fire from the primitive pyro effects used.  Hilarious.  Outside referees and a camera man had to climb up the tall cage and put it out, but it’s not effective.  So Muta loads up the MIST~!! and spits it out.  Despite the fact that’s it’s a no-disqualification cage match where you can presumably die electrocution from, tag rules are being enforced.  Funk and Flair start with Funk getting a shoulderblock.  To the corner, where Flair fires off some chops and whips Terry into Sting.  Muta comes in to try and intimidate Flair and referee Bruno, then Funk and Flair go at it again.  Scoopslam by Funk is no-sold by Flair, who fires off a couple slams himself, then another slam over the top rope and to the floor.  Flair snaps Funk on the top rope, then tags in Sting.  Sting weakly chops at Funk and takes him to the floor, where he throws his head through one of the links in the cage.  Back in, he tags Flair and shoots him off Funk for a double elbow.  Flair whips Funk from pillar to post, then chops him down.  Kneedrop by Flair and a bitch slap for Muta.  Muta comes in and tries to smack Flair, but gets held by Sting for a free shot.  More chopping by Flair, then a tag to Sting who hits a dropkick.  Muta tags in, and Sting goes nuts on him, then press-slams him into Funk.  Suplex by Sting, then a tag to Flair, who snapmares Muta over and mounts some punches.  Atomic drop to Muta, then some chopping and punching in the corner.  Snapmare and a kneedrop to him, then a tag to Sting.  He dumps Muta to the floor and rams him into the flimsy cage.  The cage has way too much give to it, so any ramming into it looks incredibly weak.  Sting then hoists Muta up on his shoulder and tries to ram him through one of the links of the cage, and that looks even more weak.  Funk climbs the cage, which is somehow supposed to help Muta, but Flair yanks him down.  Back in, Muta gets punches in on Sting and gets him to the heel corner, where Funk gets some shots in.  Snapmare by Muta and a snap elbowdrop.  Big legdrop by Muta, then he dumps Sting.  He draws Flair in, who grabs a blatant chokehold.  Muta rakes the eyes to escape, and then the fight spills out to the floor.  Funk comes in to get Flair off of Muta, allowing Muta to come back in the ring and suplex Sting.  Funk joins him and they drop a bunch of elbows on Stinger.  Flair comes in and dumps Muta to the floor, then chops away at Funk.  Suplex to Funk while Sting ducks a big kick from Muta and hits his bulldog.  Funk eats a bulldog as well.  Sting snaps Muta off the top rope, then tags Flair.  Why even bother with the tagging?  Wrestling Logic.  Atomic drop into a clothesline by the babyfaces and Sting goes for the scorpion deathlock, but Funk saves.  Funk rams Sting into the turnbuckle, then Muta hits a kneelift.  Funk will not obey Sammartino’s orders to get out of the ring, so he tells Flair that he might as well come in.  Flair does and takes Funk out of the ring himself, then both guys retreat to their corners.  Muta dumps Sting again, but nothing happens on the floor, then Funk casually rolls Sting back in the ring.  Well that was silly.  Funk and Flair start to brawl on the cage, with Flair ramming Funk into the fence a few times.  Meanwhile, Muta climbs the other side of the cage for no goddamn fucking reason other then he must be into sadomasochism.  He climbs to high and gets a tiny zap.  The announcers are as baffled as I am.  Meanwhile, Funk tries to climb a different side. Muta and Sting return to the ring, while Funk finds a part of the upper cage that isn’t turned on, and he ends up hanging on the slanted part.  Flair then grabs a rope and swings at him like he’s Tarzan.

Quick reminder that Bruno Sammartino, the guest referee for this match, is boycotting wrestling these days because of how comical it is, unlike back in his day, and he’s a proud man who won’t have anything to do with it.  Right.  Of course, he wasn’t too proud to take a pay check to referee this farce match.  No, Bruno Sammartino is a prick, plain and simple.  Some old timers are fun to listen to when they talk about the old days, because they do it just to shoot the shit and tell stories.  Bruno doesn’t.  He lectures you on the old days, when ‘things were better.’  Right.  Back when paychecks weren’t guaranteed, scumbag promoters were trying to lowball you, the fear of matches turning into shoots was always present, matches were ninety-minutes long and consisted of thirty-minute bearhugs or chinlocks, most wrestlers were only famous on regional levels instead of international ones, and I could go on.  Bruno Sammartino is not completely an ass.  I’ve heard that when he was active he looked out for the wrestlers and would make sure everyone was treated fairly, but he really comes across like a miserable old bastard anymore.  He refuses to work with the WWE, who’s offered him cash to help with the production of a DVD set, but he refuses.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m okay with that.  It means I don’t have to sit through 3 to 9 hours worth of Bruno Sammartino matches.  But some people actually want it.  But he’s pissy because Vince McMahon changed all the rules.  Boo hoo.  If it hadn’t been him, it would have been someone else.  Get over it Bruno.

Back to the match, where Sting fights back in the ring and hoists Muta up for a press slam, holds him up there for while, then slams him down.  Funk is stilling hanging from the cage, while Muta dives under the ring, presumably to load up more mist.  Funk keeps trying to climb up the non-electrified corner, while Muta comes out from under the ring only to get teed off on by Ric Flair.  Back-suplex by Flair in the ring and he slaps on the figure four.  Meanwhile, Sting also uses the rope to Tarzan into Funk.  Flair lets go of Muta and tosses him out of the ring, then goes to the corner and… uh… watches Sting and Funk.  This allows Muta to come from behind and take Flair down with a nasty kick, then slap on an Indian deathlock.  He bridges it, while Funk starts to take control of Sting on the cage.  Funk ties Sting to the cage (looks like shit) and then comes in the ring to hit a spiked piledriver on Flair.  We get a close up of the knot.  “Looks like one of those cowboy knots” says Bob Caudle.  Looks like a regular knot to me.  Ole Anderson comes over to help but he can’t figure it out.  Well, nobody accused Ole of being a brain child or anything.  The heels keep beating on Flair in the ring, while Ole uses a knife to cut Sting free.  Here’s a thought: since Tully Blanchard and Magnum TA set a precedence for stabbing people with sharp objects in a wrestling match, and considering it’s no-DQ, why not just leave Sting hanging and use the knife to go into the ring and stab Muta and Funk in their hearts, then cut Sting down later?  That’s bound to get the pinfall, although I’ve seen Muta no-sell worse.   Anyway, Sting leaps off the cage, over the ropes and into Funk.  Okay, that was cool.  Given how bad these Legends of Wrestling sets have been, I half expected him to wipe out trying it.  Flair chops at Funk while Muta climbs the cage.  Half-drop by Flair and a kneedrop to the leg to set up Funk for the figure four.  Muta down and he gets chopped, but that’s ignored because he wants to fire off a spinkick at Sting as he climbs into the ring.  Back breaker to Sting and Muta calls for moonsault, the retard running the production decides that it’s more important to watch Flair work Funk’s leg, and by time the dumb shit cuts back to Muta he’s been crotched on the ropes.  Flair hooks in a figure four, then Sting comes off the rope with a splash on Funk while he’s in it.  Then another, but Gary Hart refuses to throw in the towel.  Ole comes over, smacks Gary and knocks the towel out of his hand in the process which gives the win to Sting & Flair.
*** Despite my sarcastic remarks, this was actually not half-bad.  Entertaining garbage would be the best way to put it.  Stupid, illogical, and fun.  Like a Michael Bay movie.

Match #7
Ric Flair vs. Curt Hennig
10/11/99 Nitro

Oooh, random.  This was the week after the famous Bret Hart/Chris Benoit match on Nitro that was a tribute to Owen Hart.  The match did a pretty decent rating, mostly because the smart-marks ate it up and made sure everyone who missed it knew to watch the replay (there used to be a replay of Nitro an hour or so after it aired every Monday), and thus WCW had one of it’s rare good ideas: “let’s just do a big match that the smarks will eat up like that every week!”  As with every other good idea WCW had, it was forgotten about after one week.  Not that WWE doesn’t do the same thing.  When CM Punk won the IC title last year, he was going to be a ‘fighting champion’ who defended the belt every single week on Raw.  And that was forgotten about seconds after the words left his mouth.

Bitch slap by Flair and Hennig bails.  Back in, wrestling sequence goes nowhere and Flair wooos.  Shoot off and Hennig gets a shoulderblock.  Lockup and Hennig is shoots off into a shoulderblock, then Flair gets a back-elbow.  Brawling in the corner by Flair, then a chop and a blatant low-blow, but at this point I think WCW was using no-DQ rules for all it’s matches.  To the floor, where Flair chops Hennig on the guardrail, then over the announce table, where Hennig fights back with his own stiff chops and a ram into the table.  Hennig drops a sledge off the apron, but Flair starts to fight back with some chops.  Back in, Hennig catches Flair climbing in and suplexes him over the ropes for two.  Commercial break.

This one is brought to you by my Youtube channel, which I’ve been using to host my Halo 3 highlights.  If you’re a fan of the game, check it out.  Some pretty cool stuff in there, and some funny accidental team-kills as well.

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We’re back in time to see a chop-off.  Flair gets whipped up and over the corner, but he lands on his feet and chops Virgil… or Vincent or Shane or Curly or Joe Shittheragbag or whatever the fuck he was called that week… but he gets punched and backdropped getting back in the ring.  Hennig charges into a back-elbow, but catches Flair climbing and tosses him off the top.  More chopping by Flair and he slaps on the figure four, but Hennig makes the ropes.  Chopblock by Flair, then a blatant eye-gouge.  Back-suplex by Flair, but he knocks himself goofy doing it and Curt chops him.  Hennig starts to work the knee as well, dropping his weight on it.  He kicks at the leg, then chops him some more in the corner, but Flair fights back and punches Hennig to the corner, then snaps him off the ropes.  Virgil gets up on the apron and Flair has to fight him off.  Hennig pushes Flair over and covers him with his feet on the ropes for two, then Virgil comes over to hold Hennig’s legs on the rope to add pressure, but it still only gets two.  BUT WAIT~!! because David Flair is out, apparently during an ‘on again’ part of his on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again, on again, off-again, on again, off again relationship with his dad to yank Virgil off the ropes, allowing Flair to roll up Perfect.  Flair barely manages to reach the ropes with his feet, but he somehow does it better and despite it looking incredibly weak, it gets the pin.
*** Decent for what is was.  Nowhere near the level of their match from Raw from years earlier, but both guys were older and this is WCW, which could screw up a cup of coffee.

BOTTOM LINE: I don’t know how the WWE managed to get a set with Ric Flair’s name attached to it and not have it have a single match that’s really worth going out of your way to get.  The best match here was later featured on the Best of Starrcade, and everything else is just passable or worse.  Thumbs down.

BOTTOM LINE FOR LEGENDS OF WRESTLING THREE DISC SET: Easily the worst three-disc collection the WWE has put out.  You get twenty-seven matches.  Of those, only ONE reached four stars, and that was not exclusive to this set.  That’s beyond pitiful.  This entire series has felt cheap, rushed, and loveless.  This is the low-point for WWE DVDs over the last few years.  Huge thumbs down.  Honestly, I wouldn’t recommend even buying this on sale.  Maybe if the three-disc set dropped to $9.99 it would be worth picking up.  Maybe.

But stay tuned, because the three Best Buy exclusives are coming up over the coming days.

Check out Charlie Reneke's archive for more of the awesome, ranty, ravey, hilariously cool Way Too Long Reviews. If you enjoyed his review and want to contribute towards more, you can check out his Amazon Wish List at http://www.amazon.com/wishlist/1ZUZW3Z6CAPE5. Likewise if you hated his review, you can punish him by buying stuff off his Amazon Wish List and give him lots more stuff to carry around. That'll learn him.