The Rager – The Old Pay Per View Debate (WWE Hell in a Cell 2011)

Welcome, dearest wrestling fans and Rage enthusiasts, I am Chris and this is your weekly edition of The Rager. I have a very specific rant to get to but first, here are my reactions to last night’s Hell In A Cell:

-I decided to watch HiaC with the Spanish commentary, I don’t speak Spanish but its gotta be better for my sanity in the long run. Besides, WWE has basically established this as a throw-away PPV so who cares, right? (more on that later)

– As for Sheamus v. Christian, I know I’m in the minority on this but Christian just doesn’t do anything for me, on the mic or in the ring. I think it all comes down to the Killswitch, it looks so awkward to set up and in the end, its not very impressive to me.

– With Sheamus winning, does that mean he gets to be the #1 Contender? Or does he still have to go dumpster diving for a while?

– NOBODY was buying into Blue Cara vs. Black Cara, we even heard a few “this is boring” chants and I can’t say that I blame them. Yes they had their fantastic moves but there really wasn’t any sense of one having any kind of momentum over the other. Also, I believe I counted about 3 botches during the match, is that an accurate number? Maybe its because the usual WWE audience isn’t exactly familiar with the culture and pacing of a traditional Mexican wrestling match, maybe the audience is burnt out on the whole Sin Cara nonsense (I am).

– By the way, I flipped back to English at one point during Cara v. Cara and they were just then coming to the conclusion that they could differentiate betwixt the two by identifying them by the color of their ring attire…and with that, I switch back to espanol…bliss.

– My initial reaction to the last minute match between Cody Rhodes and John Morrison was that it was gonna be a quick match where Rhodes would pull off some sort of cheap, quick win and get out. However, I was pleasantly surprised when we ended up with a quality match. I know I’m late to this but I legit ready for Cody to be top-tier.

– I really don’t have too much to say about Orton and Mark Henry. Henry was his slow, usual self and I don’t really think HiaC is Orton’s element. I’m not saying it was a bad match by any means, it just wasn’t anything to shake a stick at.

– Beth won the Divas title 2 weeks too late, I still could care less…how much longer do we have to wait on Kharma?

– I was very pleased with Cena/Punk/Del Rio, I dug the pace and I enjoyed how one guy would land a move on both guys and then try to pin both, its the little stuff that make the difference for me.

– My favorite moment was Cena getting locked out, it was incredibly smart and I never would’ve thought of that, as simple as it was.

– LET IT BE KNOWN: I decided to partake in Pulse Wrestling’s Roundtable and out of the 5 matches that were on the bill prior to the beginning of HiaC, I correctly predicted all 5 of them. I know that a good bit of people did the same because it was a highly predictable show but I’ll still take the win so suck it.

– We all pretty much knew the Miz and R-Truth ended was coming as well as their other interruptions during the night. However, I do love how everything was done…maybe even overdone but I loved it. The use of the roster trying to get in the cell to show that they take pride in their company and even the use of police officers to subdue both men, as well as keep the other back just seemed to add credibility to the event. Although, I could have done with out HHH’s Austin-esq attack when Miz and Truth were being brought out. I felt like it would have been even better if the police decided to cuff HHH at that point, as well…or at least bring out the tasor, he can handle it.

Now for the Main Event
This is the main rant I wanted to get into during the entire PPV because I just knew it was going to end pretty ridiculously early just by going off the fact that they had 2 weeks to prepare after NoC. But I don’t see it getting any better with Vengeance coming in just 2 weeks. This brought up the debate in my head that the WWE audience has been having for years and thats the age old question “Does WWE have too many PPVs?” MY answer is definitely yes, especially during the summer/fall months when everything seems to smushed together despite having lackluster storylines. Those two factors equate to PPVs ending 30 minutes early and if HiaC doesn’t have a low buyrate, I can almost guarantee Vengeance will.
“But Chris, if there’s too many PPVs during the year, what all-knowing geniusness do you have to bestow upon us that would fix the situation?”

First off, you’re far too kind for I am no genius…but the customer is always right. Secondly, I have several ideas that came to mind. First was the idea of just doing a PPV every other month but that might be too long to go but it would stress the importance of each PPV, especially if WWE continues its model of having the big titles only change hands at a PPV. But if every other month is too long, I had the idea of doing one every 6 weeks, but it would be harder for the unwashed masses to keep track as compare to once a month. So here’s what I think is the best solution: One PPV per month except for the month before Royal Rumble, Wrestlemania, Summerslam and Survivor Series. I believe that would fix the problem and build up more excitement and antici……..

….pation for the big 4. What solution do you think would work best? Do you have any solutions of your own? Are you part of the unwashed masses? If you have answers to any of these questions or have any random comment about what I’ve said, personal insults at my expense or just wanna say hello, comment below and lets rap (I promise to have my sleeves rolled up to my elbows and sitting in a chair backwards).

That does it for me this week. Be sure to follow me on Twitter and I will talk to you on there during Raw tonight, blow up your twitter feed and maybe even answer your deepest, darkest questions…follow and find out!!! Or if you wanna be lame, you can email me at cwsanders39@gmail.com.

Random Funny Thing on the Internets
I giggled.

As always, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do twice,
Chris

The Answer: if guns don’t kill people, people kill people then does that mean toasters don’t toast toast, toast toast toast?

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