A super-quick recap runs through the rise of Lashley and we see him win the KOTM Title last week. Lashley walks backstage and bumps into Corgan, Dixie, and Aron Rex. Corgan’s Impact theme plays over all of this, so it has no drama. Edwards vs. Moose is announced, and the tag team 4 way ladder match is hyped up. It seems absolutely ridiculous to have everyone kill themselves for a tag title shot against Decay of all times – crazy bumps for a bad match to be the end result. Storm comes out in bizarre jeans to address the fans.
Storm brings Brian Hebner out and says somebody F’ed up! He shows himself getting a cover and visual pin, so Hebner explains he was getting JB out and the fans chant “you need glasses!”. He wants a rematch, but Billy Corgan comes out. He says that games are won in the fourth quarter, and Storm says this is pro wrestling and not football. Corgan is actually taller than Storm here, and Storm wants a rematch and gets a chant for it. Corgan says that he’s a TNA Original and he shouldn’t beg – and maybe he just can’t win the big one.
Storm grabs a hammer and says that he helped build this damn company, but he’ll tear it down if he has to and insults Corgan. Security comes out to protect Corgan and Storm tells them to not touch him. Storm says that AJ and Roode left, but he believes in TNA and says Corgan can’t talk to him about begging “you stupid son of a bitch!” and then hits a goon with a bottle. Corgan uses this time to further rub salt in the wounds saying this just proves his point. Storm says he’ll smash his pumpkin if he crosses his path again. Josh calls them “almost threat-like words!”. Corgan threatens him and Josh says that Corgan is the TNA president.
Josh announces Moose vs. Bennett, and Bennett talks to Moose about how good Moose is at beating up guys. Bennett has traded in his Florida retiree getup for jeans and a Miracle t-shirt. I think it’s an upgrade. Josh talks over the Storm-Corgan segment and then Storm is backstage and tells everyone backstage to get off him and leave him alone. He gets in his rental car and leaves. Eddie comes down for his match with Moose. Moose’s “MOOSE” deal gets a mild reaction once again.
Moose came off like so much of a bigger star in ROH than TNA and part of it there is seeing his growth as a wrestler. In ROH, you got to see him go from being a rookie to someone who was very good and just needed to go to finishing school. In TNA, his rough edges are highlighted more, aren’t hidden by high-end talent, and he’s exposed as not being as good as his potential – and the last thing TNA needs is another guy who isn’t as good as his potential.
Moose is playing a very generic cocky heel and eats a pair of double knees off the apron. Moose powerbombs him on the apron and tosses him in for 2. Moose hits a sloppy snake eyes before locking on a sleeper, and then a longer sleeper before slapping away at Eddie. Moose goes for a run-up blind dive crossbody, but eats a dropkick. Bennett distracts Eddie, who eats a pop-up lariat for 2. Moose misses a corner charge and eats a jumping kick and then a super rana. Moose picks him up off with a sitout tree slam and won.
Maria talks to Jade and Maria says that tonight isn’t about Jade respecting Gail, it’s about control and if Jade loses, she’ll never get a knockouts title shot again. Maria bullies Allie and tells her to get Gail and then Jade goes to insult Maria, but gets talked down to. Gail comes out and then Jade does, while Josh plugs the articles done on her about domestic abuse. Kudos to TNA for not shying away from that because they could just do nothing with it, and instead are shining a light on it and praising her for being true to what happened in her life.
They exchange a variety of armlocks and Jade gets a rana. They get into a back and forth chop battle in the corner. Jade lands a series of round kicks, then palm strikes and more kicks for 2. Gail misses a back elbow that is kinda sold, before almost hitting another one and Jade going back for it. 619 to Jade and she goes for a dive, but Jade catches her and does an awkward double knee gutbuster. Josh points out how this probably hurt Jade more and was a bad idea. Gail hits a series of bad forearms before landing a tilt a whirl headscissors. Gail hits a lariat and a senton for 2. Jade recovers and misses a Lionsault for 2. Weird cradle gets 2 for everyone before they roll onto Earl. Gail hits Eat Defeat, but Sienna comes down and hits the AK 47 on the floor. Pounce by Sienna hits Jade. Maria says that Gail failed, while Josh points out that Gail actually won via DQ. Lashley talks to Mandrews, DJZ, and Braxton Sutter and buries the division. They kind of stand up for themselves, but not really. This helped no one.
DJZ comes out for the match, with Spud, Sutter, and Mandrews getting no intro. Spud is mad at Sutter for messing up his teeth, which now have braces and everyone just beats up Spud. Cradle series gets a 2 count. Mandrews hits a DDT and goes for a standing moonsault, but gets kicked off. Sutter gets 2 off a powerslam, which is broken up by Mandrews doing an SSP instead of literally any other move that would take less time. Spud goes to curb stomp Sutter with the ropes, and then DJZ wins with a somersault double DDT. EC3 vs. Drew recap.
Recap of the Storm-Corgan thing leads to Dixie saying the Lashley thing has everyone on edge and then she’s drowned out by EC3’s theme. Drew bitches about EC3 robbing him of the title in three title rematches. EC3 accepts the match before Aron Rex’s theme hits. Rex holds the mic like he did as Sandow and says that the Universe has been watching Impact because the roster is changing the game. Rex says that “this is conflict and THIS IS WHAT WE LOVE!”. So he’s basically just saying that this is all just a storyline and it’s all fake. It’s weird watching a pro wrestling show deconstruct its own formula in real-time on the show. Rex says that he wants a fair match and says he will be the referee for EC3-Drew.
Eli buries Storm for losing the KOTM Title and Lashley says he doesn’t need a catchphrase because he’s the champ and doesn’t need them. Eli exposes that he’s just a catchphrase machine as Lashley just stands there looking gosmacked at him saying “yeah!” over and over. Lashley eyes Sienna, who tells him to not get cute – ha, I kinda doubt he would ever vie for the women’s title, but that was amusing.
Broken Matt meets Brother Nero, who tells him to not use ladders with rungs or fly tonight. He says that ladders are obsolete and then Jeff yells that they are obsolete. The Broken Hardys are certainly a different way to go about the Hardys than just try to recreate their 2000s act. The Broken getup actually does look great on Jeff, too, whose dark hair and lipstick works for him. EC3 vs. Drew is hyped up for next week. Eli comes down in a new green “Dummy, Yeah!” shirt before he cuts a promo on how everyone focused on Storm losing to Lashley, but instead he should’ve been losing to Eli.
Shera comes out for a match with Eli Drake, who buries his theme. Shera tries to cut a promo on him and says “dummy, yeah!”. Eli slugs away and Shera tries to sell. Shera gets a press slam. Blunt Force Trauma ends it and Bobby tells Dixie and Corgan that he acts and they react. He is going to announce the future of his titles next. Lashley comes down with two goons to carry the X and KOTM Titles while he wears the World Title. Josh calls him a beast while Pope calls him a conqueror. The guy holding the X Title is doing it perfectly, but the KOTM belt holder can’t hold it in place.
Lashley says he’s here to win “all the golds”, which sounds odd. Dixie and Corgan blandly talk about how impressive Lashley title wins are, with Corgan saying the gold represents the best in “every style”. What exactly is the KOTM Title style? Lashley says he is nixing the X and KOTM Titles to declare himself the true Undisputed Champion of pro wrestling. Lashley calls the KOTM Title garbage before burying the X Title and throwing them both down. Lashley says he’ll see them at BFG, but Corgan says that he will defend the World Title in a battle royal next week.
Billy Corgan says that Lashley just vacated the titles and he says they will crown a new X Champion soon enough. Josh says that next week’s show is Turning Point and runs down the card. Ascension to Hell is up with the BroMans getting a new theme. The Tribunal are out to even less reaction than usual without Snow, who is out due to Broken Jeff beating him up last week. The Helms Dynasty comes out, followed by the Broken Hardys. Everyone fights for a few seconds before an ad break.
We come back to see Everett sending Jessie to the floor. The Tribunal focuses on Nero to get revenge for Snow. Nero leaps off the top onto Baraka on the floor. Matt bites Everett and goes to bite Lee through his boot. He bites the faces of the BroMans. He goes after Raquel, but she slaps him and the BroMans defend her. BroDown off the ladder leads to Robbie E hitting the Boom Drop on a ladder. Lee prevents another BroDown and powerbombs Jessie into the ladder in the corner. Lee hits a jumping knee to Matt, who responds with a Side Effect on the ladder. Matt climbs the ladder and wins. Boy was this ever a nothing ladder match. Matt’s “we won – YAY!’ was amusing at least.
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Tags: billy corgan, broken matt hardy, tna impact