Everyone prepped? We’re about to launch into the first NXT of the new year. I know you’ve been waiting with nail-biting anticipation. Well, sit your over-caffeinated cabooses down as your friendly-neighborhood recapper, Jonah Kue, welcomes you to, not only our premiere rookie show of the year, but the first elimination episode.
Hmm, so, Stryker informs us that the winner of NXT will partner with their pro to take on the tag team champions…..Marellozlov ? Climactic. (You’re welcome for the couple name. And yes, I know Borscht Marinara is better. Our friend, Andy Wheeler, beat me to that one).
All-Pro Battle Royale (Ted DiBiase vs. Chris Masters vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Alberto Del Rio vs. Daniel Bryan vs. R-Truth)
We’re starting the night off with a battle royale involving all the pros. And Ricardo Rodriguez comes out to voluntarily take the place of our esteemed Alberto Del Rio. And as soon as he enters the ring, he gets caught in the longest helicopter spin I’ve ever seen via Daniel Bryan. The pros go at it, each attempting to eliminate the other. Highlights of the jumbled shenanigans involve R-Truth pulling out a “Shake, Rattle, and Rollâ€, presumably nostalgic for his K-Kwik days. Ziggler manages to eliminate Bryan. DiBiase tosses out Truth. Ziggler, after getting out of the Masterlock, rolls under the ropes, not eliminated. This allows Masters to give an out attempt to DiBiase, only for Ziggler to come in and eliminate both of them.
Winner: Dolph Ziggler
Ziggler grabs the mic and completely bashes his rookie, Jacob Novak. Ziggler wants to trade Novak for my personal pick, Byron Saxton. Good call, Dolph. Stryker, though, gives Novak a chance to prove his worth via a match with Saxton.
Commercials
Byron Saxton vs. Jacob Novak
So, we’re back with Saxton and Novak, who have switched pros. The latter takes the advantage early on with a knee to the stomach and several punches. Saxton reverses an Irish Whip only to catch a boot to his face. A few stomps and a body slam, followed by a leg drop, allows Novak to keep the momentum. Irish whip and running splash by Novak, followed by a slow mudhole stomp and an elbow drop. A nearfall later, and Novak continues the domination with an inverted sleeper. Saxton fights out of it, whips, and hits a rear elbow. Ziggler’s verbal coaching is comedy gold. That kid is definitely earning his push. Novak fights back and gets Saxton in a corner and later hits a sidewalk slam, following a chinlock. He drops Saxton, but misses an elbow drop. Saxton drops Novak with a few clotheslines and hits an inverted arm breaker. This leads to a nearfall. He whips Novak into a corner and misses a splash. Novak fires back with a clothesline and attempts a suplex, but it gets reversed into a half nelson into a reverse DDT for the win. Innovative move.
Winner: Byron Saxton via pinfall
Backstage antics with Johnny Curtis and K-Kwi…..Truth. A pep talk. How sweet.
Commercials. I’m rather looking forward to this week’s Smackdown.
Raw Rebound. I was really shocked at how good the cage match was. Had my skepticism on the dichotomy of Orton, Barrett, and Sheamus, but they really pulled it together. And Punk may be the overall best worker, in ring and character wise, they have know.
Backstage antics from earlier with Derrick Bateman and Daniel Bryan. Bateman persuades Bryan to go on a double date with the Bellas next week. Call it juvenile, but I do appreciate that kid’s humor. And Bryan’s interactions with him are priceless.
Ah, more antics with Ziggler and Saxton. Now, this duo seems to be a good mix. Saxton is still green in the ring (as expected), but get him in the ring with the right people, and he’ll shine.
Commercials.
We’re back with a challenge labeled “Battle on the Micâ€. Four immunity pounts? Stryker, sir, you’ve gone plain loco. We’ve got Brotus Clay taking on Johnny Curtis as out first round. This goes from a horrible promo by Clay to Curtis punching him. And Curtis wins. With a punch. In a battle of the mics. Ah, arguably the two best talkers of the rookies, Bateman and Saxton. After a few Carlton Banks jokes, Bateman wins this one. Jacob Novak versus Conor O’Brian. The latter gets a few Triple H nose jokes in and wins due to it. Johnny Curtis gives an admiration speech to his two opponents. Bateman makes a few Chris Hansen jokes and the obligatory rat jokes on O’Brian. Conor’s turn, and he whips out classic “yo mama†jokes. And with those jokes, O’Brian wins the challenge.
Commercials
Johnny Curtis vs. Brotus Clay
Hmm, interesting match-up, especially after that little punch exchange from the earlier challenge. Brotus misses with a punch and Curtis tries to take advantage, only to be shoulder blocked by Clay. Cutris goes ballistic and punches Clay out of the ring. Clay finally gets back in and Curtis bounces off the ropes….right into a fallaway slam. An elbow drop by Clay is followed by a nearfall. Curtis gets stomped, punched, and elbowed. Clay hits a snapmare and follows it with a nerve hold on the shoulders. Curtis fights out with a few European uppercuts, gets whipped, and hits a dropkick to the knees. He follows with a heel kick and a near fall. Curtis goes up top and hits a flying clothesline. He then, for some odd reason, tries to hit DiBiase, only to turn around and right into a chokeslam by Clay for the win.
Winner: Brodus Clay via pinfall
Clay cuts a promo, his first decent one that I’ve seen, and says he’s the marathon ‘vause he’s running through his opponents. I don’t get it.
Commercial.
We’re back and somebody’s going home and never coming back. Just like Daniel Bryan. And Alex Riley. After Curtis cuts a promo on how Brotus Clay should be eliminated, we find out that Jacob Novak is the first eliminated. He’s handed the mic for the farewell speech, only for Ziggler to fall asleep through it. Ziggler mocks Masters picking up Novak and losing him. Man, I love that kid on the mic. Masters attempts to put Ziggler in the Masterlock only for Ziggler to high-tale it to the back. The rookies attempt to stop a brawl between Clay and Curtis as we fade out.
So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, good night I hate to go….hell with it. I’ll see you pretty people tomorrow in my Korner.
Adieu.
