You can’t see me. But I can see this week’s episode of NXT. And here is your tainted, yet tidy recap, ladies and gents.
We open with a a pleasant exchange between Truth and Johnny Curtis. Something about Truth having no heat and Curtis having no personality. Oh wait, sorry. That’s just what you were thinking. Next up, Richardo Rodriguez and Brodus Clay, who says he’ll take care of business. Then, I assume he walks to the bathroom to, you know, take care of business. Finally, hilarity ensued with Derrick Bateman and Daniel Bryan, who promises a punch for Bateman should he lose, and we ain’t talkin’ Hawaiian.
Theme song and crowd shots lead to the infamously-vested Stryker, who introduces us to our three remaining rookies. No pros tonight, folks. Good news, no Truth. Bad news, no Bryan. You decide where the scales are tipped. Immunity challenge is up, which includes tossing balls in cups, model making, flipping a cup, and chopstick usage. The crowd starts booing before they even start. And it doesn’t get any better. Brodus Clay takes 30 seconds to flip a freaking cup. I don’t know what’s more ludicrous; that particular fact, or the fact that I’m berating his cup flipping skills in a wrestling contest. Johnny Curtis wins. Triple threat match between the rookies is scheduled next.
Commercial.
Derrick Bateman vs. Brodus Clay vs. Johnny Curtis
We start with the three measuring each other. Bateman and Curtis attempt to double team Clay, who fights them off, tosses Bateman out of the ring, and corners Curtis. A belly to belly suplex to Curtis later, and he knocks Bateman back to the outside of the ring. Clay gets Curtis set for the chock slam, but Bateman comes in dropkicks the big guy. A few kicks added to Clay’s back by Bateman. Double team by Bateman and Curtis once again. Clay gets cornered by the two, but fights back with chops and headbutts. Clay adds a splash to the corner on Bateman. He goes for a choke, but Curtis interrupts and the double team is on again. They clothesline Clay out of the ring. Curtis takes advantage and whips Bateman, only to miss with a clothesline, but Bateman hits a suicide dive to the outside on Clay. Curtis is the only one standing in the middle of the ring. He hits a pretty impressive somersault to the outside, takes out Clay and Bateman, and lands on his feet. Nice.
Commercial.
We’re back as Clay is on the outside, staggered, and Curtis has Bateman in an armbar. Curtis breaks it to hit Clay again, then hits a snap suplex on Bateman for the nearfall. A clothesline by Curtis on Bateman and another nearfall. Bateman fights back and hits a swinging neckbreaker for a nearfall of his own. Clay makes it back to the ring, only to be dropkicked by Bateman. Clay eats another running dropkick to the head by Bateman. Bateman hits another running dropkick, this time on Curtis, and gets a nearfall. Clay comes back and takes control, eventually getting Curtis in a vice grip. He hits a running bump on Curtis, then hits a rope-assisted kick on Bateman. Clay, then hits a running rump bump (can’t believe I fucking said that) to Bateman’s face. A boot choke later, and Clay goes back to Curtis. His hits a fisherman’s suplex for a nearfall. Another bump on Bateman, and Clay hits a fisherman’s on Bateman for a pin that gets interrupted by a flying headbutt by Curtis, who gets a nearfall on both opponents (run ons, anyone?) Clay gets double teamed now, and Bateman and Curtis hits a double suplex. Curtis then suplexes Bateman right on Clay and pins Bateman for the win.
Winner: Johnny Curtis via pinfall
Commercial.
We recap Cena’s response to the Rock. Nice to see the guy actually cut loose again. We’ve been in need of this Cena for a long, long time. Oh, and Rock’s still better. Raspberries.
Commercial.
We’re back to Stryker and the rookies with our elimination. Brodus Clay has immunity. And….Derrick Bateman is eliminated? Really? Talk about a damn bad choice. Well, after Bateman’s last words, Brodus Clay cheap shots Johnny Curtis.
Ending credits and out.
