Retro-Review 5: All-Star Superman #3
“Sweet Dreams, Superwoman…”
Published by DC Comics
Written by Grant Morrison
Art by Frank Quitely
At first I thought that this comic isn’t that old, but then I realized it’s been closer to seven years already since it was released. This series was good and bad. It was a damn good read at the time. On the other hand, it made me wish that the regular Superman line was this much fun. I didn’t necessarily want the silver-age elements included in the mainstream line, but I just wanted it to include the sense of fun and wonderment contained within this series.
The Plot
This issue begins with Superman giving Lois her birthday present, which is his powers in liquid form and it’s good for a 24 hour period. A creature from the depths of the Earth named Krull is attacking Metropolis, which prompts Superman and Superwoman to intervene. However, Atlas and Samson enter the fray and end the conflict. Superman returns the creatures to the depths and speaks with Dino-czar Tyrannko (this is truly Grant Morrison writing his best Superman) who informs him that Samson lured him there. Meanwhile, Lois receives a necklace with Radioactive Crown Jewels from Samson as a gift. Both Samson and Atlas are vying for Lois’ affections much to the chagrin of Superman. It is then revealed that the Jewels of Atom-Hotep were actually stolen and they were followed by the Ultra-Sphinx. Lois’ life hangs in the balance as Superman must answer the unanswerable question in order to save her life. Superman is angry with Atlas and Samson after they confess that they deliberately lured the Ultra-Sphinx to Superman so he would handle the situation. Superman fails to answer the question, which lobotomizes Lois for the remainder of her life. Distraught he flies back into the sun. Seriously though, that doesn’t happen and he answers the question correctly. Atlas and Samson still maintain that Superman must perform a feat of strength for Lois’ affections. He then proceeds to break their arms while arm wrestling them simultaneously…because that’s how Superman rolls. Superman and Lois fly away and they share a passionate kiss on the moon. Lois’ powers are beginning to fade away and she falls asleep in Superman’s arms as he may be preparing to pop the question. He tucks Lois in bed and walks away with a future headline pertaining to his own death.
The Breakdown
Man this was a good issue. I enjoyed the first two, but this is the issue that blew me away and really had me anticipating the rest of the series. Morrison was over-the-top, nostalgic, etc. etc. etc. and really funny. The part when Mr. Lombard said, “You tell me what a spaceman flying around in his underwear can give her that a good old hunk of prime American manhood can’t?” made me laugh. It was evident that he was really having a lot of fun with this series. The characters Samson and Atlas were so absurd that they worked perfectly in this continuity. They were so buffoonish and egotistical. Even after Superman got them out of trouble with the Ultra-Sphinx they still goaded him and called him cowardly for not performing a feat of strength. Even the way they claimed that they were going to fight alongside him was funny because it was so insincere. Samson knowing of Superman’s death confirmed that something was going to come of this. After reading the first issue, I wrote it off that he would overcome it rather quickly. I’m actually not even sure how this is resolved yet as my LCS’s sold out of many of the next issues, including issue 12. I really enjoyed Superman answering the question because it showed the scope of his abilities and he did it with such ease. Getting Lois’ perspective on what it was like to experience Superman’s powers was interesting (smelling the trees in Canada and seeing all of that gorgeous radio). Even the art was a plus in this issue for me. I’ve both liked and disliked Quitely’s art over the years. Sometimes I think that his faces, etc. are kind of horrid to look at. However, sometimes he just nails things too. This issue was pretty much awesome. He made Superman look so imposing and grand without a ton of muscles and details drawn into his figure. I also enjoyed his rendition of Superman because he made him look like such a warm and gentle individual, which is the essence of Superman. The splash page with Superman kissing Lois on the moon was truly iconic. It doesn’t happen all too often that we are given an image that will always resonate with readers. This issue was so much fun.
BUT…
When Superman arm wrestled Atlas, he broke his right arm. However, in the newspaper he had both arms in a cast. I’ve never been sure if I missed something or if that was a continuity gaffe. This comic was only 22 pages…I would’ve loved it to have been more. If I had anything more to complain about then the problem would be with me and not the comic. Some people needlessly bitch, whine, and complain (and manage to do them simultaneously) about things no matter what the quality is. Unless someone is actually willing to dialogue about it though then they are a lost cause in terms of being a comic fan and should perhaps consider a different less stressful hobby. I was actually guilty of wanting things to complain about in comics because I was getting so jaded. This comic helped me to appreciate different types of comics and that good comics are not always dark and grim (which was so prevalent at the time…and still kind of is). This comic made me seek out the New Frontier, which I also enjoyed immensely. Not everyone is going to love this comic because not every comic is going to suit everyone’s tastes, but to a lot of fans this was like a perfectly cooked steak marinated in awesome sauce (my attempt at using silver age-like enthusiasm).
Rating: 9.5 out of 10 (when originally read 10 out of 10)
Great stuff and these days it’s tough to find something that can be enjoyed by all ages. I really do have to finish reading the complete series. Maybe I’ve put it off because I’m afraid that it’ll be anticlimactic…who knows. I do recommend people to read this comic though if they enjoy Superman at all. If you need something fun to read though then this comic may be your answer.
