No Chance – Way too early predictions for WrestleMania XXX

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Chris’s Picks:

1. Undertaker vs Cena
I’m just going to continue to make this prediction until it happens because it just seems like it’s bound to take place before Taker calls it quits. I don’t think Cena should be the one to break it, Cena’s got enough to hang his hat on, but I just don’t know how many more years Taker can do this, especially if this summer is his alleged farewell tour.

2. Brock Lesnar vs Ryback
I was gonna have Brock and Rock but I really don’t buy the Rock injury angle and I think there’s a good chance we won’t see Rock at all at WM 30. I needed a match for Brock and this seemed to make sense seeing as how Ryback is the heir apparent to be the face of the company once Cena-mania dies down or retires. I don’t have too much logic supporting this as I needed a match for both guys.

3. CM Punk vs Stone Cold Steve Austin
It either happens at Wrestlemania 30 or it doesn’t happen at all.

4. WWE Championship: Randy Orton(c) vs Dolph Ziggler
To all of our displeasure, WWE will build Randy back into the championship picture and it did pain me to think he would be holding the belt but hey! Look! I put Dolph in a championship match! That makes it better right? Right? Hello?

5. World Heavyweight Championship: Wade Barrett(c) vs Daniel Bryan
I still think WWE wants Barrett to win a Money in the Bank match at some point in the near future and Daniel Bryan winning the Royal Rumble has a nice ring to it.

6. Double Ladder Match for IC and US Championships:
Kane vs Cody Rhodes vs Damien Sandow vs Kofi Kingston vs The Miz vs Sheamus vs Kassius Ohno vs Big E Langston vs Alberto Del Rio vs Fandango

This comes out of the rumored match WWE scraped for WM29 because Vince allegedly isn’t a fan of Cesaro but idea sounded cool so I’m hoping it comes up again. It’s a 10 man double ladder match with both titles hanging over the ring. All 10 men are eligible for both championships and the match ends once both have been retrieved and could, conceivably, be won by one person.

7. Divas Championship: AJ(c) vs Kaitlyn
Why not, right?

8. Dean Ambrose vs Roman Reigns vs Seth Rollins
I’m fully expecting Shield to be active throughout the entire year but we all know WWE is going to break them up at some point, why not make it at Mania?

Rhett’s Picks:

John Cena vs. The Undertaker

I think this will happen just for the reasoning that who else does Undertaker have to fight? I guess he could technically go fight Punk again. Or Rock. Or Brock. But it seems like the WWE has their eyes set on Rock vs. Brock so that left only Punk and Cena to choose between. John Cena has done absolutely everything in the realm of a face so the only real challenges left for him are The Undertaker’s Streak and going heel. Who knows? It could be both. Doubtful so I say he challenges The Undertaker next year for the big 30th anniversary.

The Rock vs. Brock Lesnar
Although this storyline got scrapped at Raw, I still think this match will happen as it’s a big draw for both movie fans of The Rock and UFC fans of Brock. The Action Star vs. The UFC Monster. Sounds like money to me. Plus it keeps two part-timers together so they don’t drag down an additional feud by never being present.
WWE Heavyweight Championship: Randy Orton vs. Ryback
This one was kind of a shot in the dark, but they need to have some seriously over people in the WWE title match and who better than these two for being over? I say that Randy Orton will be the WWE Champion here and be a heel after turning on Cena and taking the belt off of him at Royal Rumble. They could have Undertaker cost Cena the match. Claim he’s the only real challenge left or whatever. So yes that means that Ryback will be back to a face next year. I don’t really find that surprising as attacking and challenging is almost a face move nowadays. I say that Ryback will start stalking Orton and the belt. Or y’know just let WWE have him win at Elimination Chamber. *sigh* That’s such a stale concept now.

World Heavyweight Championship: Sheamus vs. Antonio Cesaro vs. Dolph Ziggler
So after Orton and Sheamus being out of the title picture for so long, I see them getting their belts back by the big show next year. Anyways, I see Dolph being the champ going into Elimination Chamber, but he loses it there to Sheamus in the Elimination Chamber. Dolph cashes in his rematch. You might be wondering where Cesaro fits in? I say he wins the Royal Rumble in somewhat of a surprise after they hype Ryback winning a ton. Heck the final four could be Sheamus/Ryback/Antonio Cesaro/CM Punk. Anyways, Cesaro would then choose the World Title in order to prove he’s more of a brute than Sheamus and more talented than Dolph.

Triple H vs. The Shield
Well. This would be a way to tie up Triple H and all it would take is a Cerberus Bomb (TM: Steven Berkman) to Vince McMahon. Triple H comes back to take out The Shield, but they keep running until WrestleMania. There we have this handicap match in which The Shield obliterates him. Of course this is a big gamble because who’s to say that these guys will even be together this time next year? Well if Triple H doesn’t pan out because he’s an unpredictable part-timer then The Shield will be fighting themselves in a triple threat.

CM Punk vs. Alberto del Rio
This would be the technical bout of the evening with Punk trying to prove he can make anyone tap out. (Punk is back to a face by here though) Del Rio (back to heel after the failed face run) bum rushes Punk and forces him into the Armbar thus igniting a feud that runs into Mania with a Submission match.

WWE Tag Team Championship: Wade Barrett and The Big Show vs. Fandango and Brodus Clay
Eh just some more creative thinking. Wade and Big Show could make an interesting team with both of them just want to knock people out with their elbows and fists. Fandango I think will go face due to how over the guy is. But he will have lost a lot of his following by this time. So Sweet T either disappears or gets taken out by Big Show and Wade leading to Clay incorporating Fandango as his partner.

Daniel Bryan vs. Chris Jericho
This could also be a technical bout, but I think both of these men have sort of moved past that territory into strictly high-impact entertainment. Therefore I see this happening just to see who can steal the show at WrestleMania. This is another gamble because I have no idea if Jericho will even be back by this time.

United States Championship Kofi Kingston vs. Evan Bourne
They talked about Kofi going heel so why not have Kofi and Evan join forces again when Evan comes back, but Kofi just walk out of the match and leaves Evan to Wade and Big Show to dismantle. Granted Kofi could have lost and regained the United States Championship by this time. Actually. How about they turn Kofi heel, have him fight some of the bigger dogs (Cena, Orton, whoever) lose to them decide to go back to the United States scene, win that belt, Evan comes back and ‘turns’ Kofi face. They team up for a few weeks before the big title match. He leaves Evan for Big Show and Wade in like December. Evan disappears for a month or two. Then they have a big battle royal for Kofi’s belt. Evan surprises returns and wins it. Kofi avoids fighting him until WrestleMania. Evan finally wins.

Titus O’Neil vs. Mark Henry
Well Mark needed a match and Vince is high on Titus and I think he would do better as a face. Here ya go. Our slow-bearhug-falling squash match of WrestleMania XXX.

Intercontinental Championship: Cody Rhodes (c) vs. Kane vs. Christian vs. The Miz
Literally just a way to have the rest of the guard on the show. The Miz could just recently have lost the title to Cody and Kane and Christian could have a running feud with either of them. *shrugs* However they want to go with this. Just a way to have as many people on the card as possible. Sure beats the hell out of the 8-Man Mixed Tag Match.

Diva’s Championship: Kaitlyn (c) vs. AJ
Well it didn’t happen this year and who really cares at this point? Why not just let Kaitlyn hold the belt until that date? No one cares about it anyways and she could break the record or whatever. AJ wins for a big face moment.

Joel’s Picks:

Brock Lesnar vs. The Rock

A week and a half ago, this was an all but guaranteed match for Mania 30, but then Rock mysteriously up and left, leaving us to question what exactly had gone on backstage. Still, even if there is now bad blood between The Rock and the company, too much money stands to be made off of a Brock and Rock match. Think how many people we were should would never be in a WWE ring again because of behind the scene squabbles, only too see them return when the money was right for everyone.

John Cena vs. The Undertaker (WWE Championship)

This was actually a match that I wanted for CM Punk this year, with him putting his year long reign against Taker’s WrestleMania streak. But alas it was not to be. However having this stipulation next year will offer a small consilation prize, because if Cena should be the one to end the streak (boo) there is a very easy story to set up where Punk doesn’t want Cena’s title reign to be longer than his. It means we would have to put up with a Cena champion for a year straight, but imagine the payoff with CM Punk going after Cena in the main event of WrestleMania 31.

CM Punk vs. Stone Cold:

It’s now or never. Both men have said that they want this match to happen. WrestleMania 30 is the perfect time to pull the trigger. Any point after that and they’ve probably waited too long. The time is now.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Randy Orton (WHC)

While I would love a year title reign for Dolph, that’s not what I’m asking for. But if he could at least stay near the title scene throughout the year that would be great. That’s not too much to ask right? And maybe don’t have him job to Swagger on an episode of Raw the week after winning the title?

Bella vs. Bella

I actually had the same match as the previous two guys until I saw that we all were predicting the same thing. This way, if I somehow magically end up being right, I’ll look like a genus.

Rey Mysterio vs. Del Rio

I’ve predicted a Mask vs. Mask match for Mysterio and Sin Cara for a few years now. But with Sin Cara being the biggest disappointment in the WWE, this time, he’s out. But as it’s closing in on time for Rey to retire, one last glorious WrestleMania moment, is probably not out of the question for the guy, provided he won’t be injured this time next year.

The Team Friendship Fight:

Team Friendship honestly will most likely not be able to make it another entire year, but if they do this is the match I want. Kane vs. Daniel Bryan the winner is the undisputed tag team champions, and had to defend the titles solo at Extreme Rules next year.

Triple H vs. Vince McMahon (w/Ryback)

And what’s a celebration of thirty years of WrestleMania without a little bit of passing the torch? Vince returns to his heel persona, and then Triple H has to fight his father in law for control of the company. Ryback is also in Vince’s corner so that 1. Ryback gets a spot on the card, and 2. Triple H will actually have someone to fight in the ring.

Ladder match to unify the mid card titles (with: The Shield, Wade Barrett, Evan Bourne, Kofi Kingston, Miz, Christian, and Big E)

Based on an idea that was supposedly floating around backstage this year but never came to fruition, it’s a way to get a lot of the full times on a card that is usually crowded with part times. Plus as Chris points out, this type of match can really give Mania a shot in the arm, something that has been lacking since MiTB got its own PPV.

Joel Leonard reviews the latest movies each week for Inside Pulse. You can follow him @joelgleo on Twitter though he's not promising to ever tweet anything from there. Joel also co-hosts the Classy Ring Attire podcast and writes the No Chance column on Inside Pulse as well.