As a fan of The Amazing Race, we’re bound to want to do things we might regret later, like toss something with edges at our new flatscreen LCD HDTV. Such things can constitute justifiable homicide when your wife finds out. With that in mind, I present my personal commandments for watching The Amazing Race: All Stars.
Thanks to Richard Mauntah for the idea and skeleton for this column.
1) Thou shalt not question the motives of one “Boston” Rob Mariano.
He may not be the world’s smartest man, but he’s shrewd and knows what to do and when to get help. Case in point, he got Daniel Negraneau to mentor him in poker.
2) Thou shalt complain when people don’t use the Yield.
People love it, people hate it, but it’s a part of the game, so use it already.
3) Thou shalt yell “Race,
This is destined to be known as the “Cho Corollary”.
4) Thou shalt try to be civil towards Mirna when the whining starts.
The over/under here is about 3 minutes.
5) Thou shalt not continually wonder why Kentucky and JVJ are “All Stars” when The Clowns, the Bransens, the Linzes and Kris and Jon are not.
Seriously, give me one reason. I like the two teams, but All-Stars? Not really.
6) Thou shalt remain irritated that you can’t watch InnerTube in Canada.
Hey Viacom, can you get on that please?
7) Thou shalt complain when yet another production-induced bottleneck occurs.
You know what I’m talking about.
8) Thou shalt cheer for Cha Cha Cha, the Beauty Queens and Eric and Danielle.
As much as I like Rob, I like these three teams more.
9) Thou shalt write about the episode every Monday.
And yes, the Leaderboard will return.
10) Thou shalt remember that no matter what, the winner could not be possibly be worse than She Who Must Not Be Named.
There are two television/sports personalities that I refuse to call by name. One has sullied one of the nicknames of my hometown, Toronto (sometimes known as T.O.), the other is the co-winner of The Amazing Race 3.
