Mike Gojira’s 10 Thoughts on WWE Survivor Series 2011

It is now one o’clock in the morning as I type this, following an extraordinary weekend that began with an awesome night out for my birthday bash (Glazer knows what I’m talking about) and ended with seeing The Rock live at MSG for the first time in over 7 years. I am physically and mentally exhausted, but because you guys clamor for me so much, I will gladly provide you with some commentary I jotted down on my phone as the night progressed.

1. Dark Match: Santino Marella vs Jinder Mahal
*My Indian friend in front of me lamented the fact that his fellow Indians are treated like jobbers in the WWE. He was unaware of Santino’s finisher as I warned him that the humiliation would only get worse. True to form, the Cobra came out to play and my friend had a priceless expression of horror and disbelief on his face that I’ll never forget.

2. John Laurinaitis Addresses the Crowd
*We couldn’t understand Laurinaitis when he came out for two honest reasons: we were booing too loudly and his voice is just impossible to hear unless there’s complete silence.

3. United States Championship: Dolph Ziggler vs John Morrison
*The New York crowd absolutely adores heels, and this certainly rang true when Dolph came out.
*We collectively booed the hell out of Morrison every time he had some offense.
*”We want Ryder!” was the most prominent chant all night.
*When Ryder came out after the match, the crowd went ballistic.

4. Lumberjill Match: Beth Phoenix vs Eve
*Mass exodus to the bathrooms.
*One of my buddies commented on the Divas’ Championship: “It’s still there?” Priceless.
*Even the cameraman in my section packed up shop when the Divas came out.
*The Glam Slam off the top rope was awesome.

5. Rock’s Promo
*When The Rock name-dropped the Tag Team Championship his father once held as the “WWF” titles, the whole crowd went “Ooooooh” as though he said something that was taboo.
*The crowd chanted “Lady Parts” which made Rock grin from ear to ear.

6. Elimination Tag Team Match
*Cody Rhodes had the biggest pop out of all the heels on his team.
*I tried to start a “BatisTwo” chant for Mason Ryan but it just turned into “Batista.”
*Sign idea for next time: “Hey Orton! I’ve got a bag you can shit in.”
*That Sin Cara failure was brutal. Apparently you can lose not only from pinfall, submission, count out, or disqualification, but from botching as well.
*I guess this means we’ll have a third Sin Cara soon enough.
*Can someone explain to Sin Cara that the term “suicide dive” should not be taken literally?
*There was an odd chant for referee Mike Chioda during the match.
*The crowd loved it when Rhodes defeated the Green Monster…otherwise known as Mason Ryan.
*I jokingly teased some kids on the train ride into Penn Station that Team Barrett would win. Guess I was right.

7. World Heavyweight Championship: Mark Henry vs Big Show

*Blair, say what you want about Mark Henry, but the crowd LOVED him at MSG.
*The following were all chanted at some point during this match: Mae Young, Sexual Chocolate, D’Lo Brown, Ahmed Johnson, Daniel Bryan, and even Undertaker.
*I honestly thought Big Show was about to kill himself with that top rope elbow drop.
*The low blow DQ finish did not sit well with us.

8. Awesome Truth Promo
*R-Truth struck gold with his rant on pigeons. He’s hysterical.

9. WWE Championship: Alberto del Rio vs CM Punk
*Great move with Howard Finkel as Punk’s personal ring announcer.
*The crowd sings along with “Cult of Personality.”
*Colt Cabana’s name is chanted.
*The crowd was super-hyped for the finish, especially the crowd surfing.

10. Main Event
*I have never in all my years heard a wrestler get booed quite like John Cena. Most heels do everything in their power to get booed and can’t hold a candle to the raw hatred the fans have for Super Cena. It’s unreal.
*Crowd chants “Don’t Tag Cena!” when Rock is the legal man…then they say “We Want Rocky!” when Cena’s in.
*The Spinebuster made everyone stand up in anticipation for what was to come.

Bonus: The Rock’s Post-PPV Promo
*After the cameras stopped rolling, Rock asked for some water. The crowd started a “Get Him Water” chant! Someone finally gave him water, but he gave it back and said it was too warm.
*The crowd is split between chanting “Welcome Back” and “You Still Got It.” Rock says, “Shit, I always had it.”
*The crowd chants for Ryder again and Rock says he’s a big fan of Zack Ryder.
*As Rock thanks the fans, someone yells out that he’s gonna cry. This prompts The Rock to say, “I’m The Rock; I don’t cry. I was about to thank the crowd and this guy here says I was gonna start crying. Clearly there’s some good weed in NYC!”
*Rock says the only reason he came back was to entertain us. And the money is quite good.
*The promo ends with Rock saying that tonight was the greatest night of his career.

Overall, it was a great experience. Well worth the money I spent (I was seated level with the ring, facing the entrance ramp). I’ll catch you guys later in the week with a Thanksgiving edition of The Stomping Ground.

So long, and thanks for all the fish.

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,