Quick thought: This song is exponentially better than that “If You Rock Like Me†monstrosity…
Apparently, Kane is going to answer Undertaker’s challenge of making their match no holds barred. Also tonight, CM Punk will face Christian. That actually sounds pretty good!
Christian is the one kicking off Smackdown with The Peep Show. Here comes del Rio. I may get crazy heat for this, but I’m already bored with him. His in-ring skill doesn’t warrant him being pushed down my throat. Christian rehashes the Spirit Squad and the Boogeyman. Some good Mexican stereotypes are thrown down, but Alberto reverses them onto Christian. Okay, guess that works. Christian challenges Alberto to a match at NoC, he vows to think about it, and Christian strikes. But Alberto rolls out of the ring. But he starts to lose it! He says, his answer is no.
Well, I was wondering if the tag team match for NoC would be confirmed tonight, and apparently, it will be, as The Hart Dynasty will face Cody Rhodes and Drew McIntyre.
Commercial.
Hart Dynasty enters, followed by Cody Rhodes, and then Drew. DH and Drew starting off, both grappling hard. Drew takes control early, but DH regains it. Cody tags in, Tyson tags in. Cody attempts to throw Tyson out of the ring, but Tyson does rope acrobatics only seen in Cirque du Soleil, and Natalya slaps the dashing off of Cody’s face.
Commercial!
Come back to Drew and DH again. Tyson tags in, and immediately goes to work on Drew. Little bit of back and forth, Tyson does some ridiculously flippy move, knocks Cody down, gets knocked down by Drew. Cody tags in, who goes after Tyson outside the ring. Rolls in, body slam, Drew tags in. Cody tags in. Too much tagging! Tyson starts to get fired up, but Cody stops it with a high kick for a two-count. Drew tags in, Drew goes for Futureshock, countered, Cody and DH tag in. DH goes for Sharpshooter, Drew intervenes, Hart Attack set up, stopped by Drew. Crossroads on DH, over.
Grade: B-
Nice to see tag team matches getting the time they deserve, and it sets up nicely for Sunday. There was a lot of back and forth, and it was an overall great match. Drew and Cody seem to fit together very well, and that is NOT a gay joke…
Another reminder that Kane will answer Taker tonight and…
Commercial.
Come back to Kofi entering. He’s blaming Vickie for all his loses and seems confident he’ll regain his title. Lots more talking, and Swagger starts his entrance before a…
Commercial.
Thank god Kofi isn’t facing Dolph tonight. I need a break from those two. Jack looks a little like Christian at half a glance. Here we go!
Swagger immediately resorts to his amateur style, grounding the high-flyer. Kofi gets Jack in the corner, and throws kicks that don’t even pretend to connect. Swagger regains control in a super fancy maneuver. Little more offense, and…
Commercial.
And we’re back. Jack goes for a pin, and fails. Jack is dominating the match as he repeatedly goes for pinfalls. Kofi threatens to gain momentum, but Jack still in control. Submission broken, Kofi getting the high kicks and high flying moves, goes for SOS, fails, missed Trouble in Paradise. Ankle lock, but Kofi grabs the ropes. The fight moves outside of the ring for a moment, Ankle Lock again, Kofi counters. Trouble in Paradise, it’s over.
Grade: C+
This match was actually given a decent amount of time, but the excitement wasn’t there. There was enough back and forth that kept it interesting, but there was no thrill.
The announcers are leading into a Hornswoggle recap, and I’m tuning out now.
Commericial.
Apparently we get Diva action tonight. Rosa and Kelly Kelly enter first. LayCool is up next. And they’re entering with Kaval…aw, how cute. Michelle shoves Naomi, which leads to an immediate brawl before the bell rings.
Kelly and Michelle in the ring, but Kelly is already making an ass of herself. Rosa tags in, Layla tags in. Rosa delivers half-hearted moves, and Layla looks fierce as she knocks off Kelly. Lay-Out, and it’s already over.
Grade: D
Layla and Michelle are actually pretty good, it disappoints me to see their matches so short. However, I didn’t have to watch Kelly wrestle that long so hey, that works for me.
Commercial.
Come back to Layla, Michelle, and Kaval. It’s aimed for Melina. They’ve put both their names in a hat to draw who would go against Melina, asking Kaval to draw. Michelle’s name is picked, and Layla doesn’t look too happy…come to find out that Layla’s name was not put in the hat at all. Uh oh, REAL TALK!
Time for CM Punk’s entrance!
Commercial.
Come back, and Alberto entered for commentary. Now, Christian and his big ole forehead band-aid.
Christian tries for some instant pinfalls, CM Punk gets the upper hand. Christian charges at Punk, who throws a knee up and Christian goes flying in a comical fashion. Little more back and forth, nothing too exciting yet, and…
Commercial.
Come back and Alberto is still chattering, Punk still owning. Both men are on the ground, and the ref counts, both get up by the count of 9. Trading punches, Christian gains momentum, Punk gets him in GTS position, countered, goes for Killswitch, Punk reverses, get Christian in pin, Christian reverses to pin Punk, who kicks out. Alberto calls out to Christian, distracts him, Punk hits the GTS for the pinfall.
Grade: C
I was really excited for this match, but Alberto’s commentary ruined it, Christian and Punk looked a bit off tonight, and the finish was too expected.
Alberto informs Christian his answer is still no, and Big Show comes out to go after Punk, then stares after Alberto. Punk back in, and Show lands a Knockout Punch, which Punk sold like a champ.
Commercial.
Kane enters. He once again promises victory. He accepts the no holds barred stipulation, and as he’s uttering Taker’s famous line, Takers bells chime. The brothers go at it, with Kane dominating. After they work their way around the ring, they crawl inside. Kane signals for a Chokeslam, which connects. Kane goes for Tombstone, which also connects. Signals his fire, and the credits roll.
